pictures worth some words

As promised, I ordered some prints from our recent competition outing — Loch Moy’s final recognized horse trial of the year. From which, as you may remember, I opted to call it a day after a less-than-stellar dressage test paired with increasingly poor ground conditions in the chilly rain.

a picture of a picture of us trotting in the rain <3

Everything might have been fine if we’d decided to continue. It’s not like the bad dressage is unusual for us LOL, not like we haven’t carried on from last place in basically every other show. But eh, with the recent whoopsie it felt a little unnecessary to push in decidedly not ideal circumstances. So, we didn’t. 

bolting in the rain too!! lolz…..

The pictures aren’t half bad (for us) tho! Like Doozy is obvi running away with me in the canter pic haha… And trust me, she was indeed. But as far as our standard fare presentation goes… I’m not sad to have the photos!

oh doozy dear, you are indeed the fastest at dressage tests!

I still had a good long talk about it with trainer C at our most recent dressage lesson, tho. Bc our scoring really is consistently just so bad. Like, “outside the normal distribution” bad. Consistently, with every judge. And it’s not just like we get the low end of any given judge’s marks. No no no, we are generally well into the “You probably shouldn’t be here” marks.

in case you wanted a graphical + annotated representation of what it means to be “objectively bad,” here we are well outside the ‘standard deviations’ of our last show’s dressage score distribution

Case in point is the handy little histogram I made of all 18 horses in our class at the show. It’s all to scale, one percentage point per tick across the horizontal axis. With 17 horses all clustered around the average score, and then a loonnnnnnnng tail of nothingness until us.

she’s 100% objectively cute tho <3 <3 <3

I maintain that I honestly do not care about winning. In fact, I don’t necessarily even care about specifically losing. I care more about how it feels while we’re doing it. Like, Charlie would still strut like a champion after putting in a severely mediocre test. Bc as far as he was concerned, he Did. The. Thing. and was a Good. Boy.

Doozy, on the other hand, sometimes almost feels like she thinks she might actually die.

i only went out to blanket her, but she wasn’t having it,
didn’t think i should be able to leave without her <3

Well ok. That’s a little dramatic. But she definitely feels like she thinks Something Bad might happen at any time. 

Which, I should note, this is the point at which most people love to tell me that I just need to “keep getting out there” and “give it time” and “keep exposing her.” Which is a strange thing for me to hear bc 1) what exactly do the people saying this to me think I’m doing??? and 2) we’re legit ‘getting out there’ far more frequently and with more regularity than most people I know, and definitely more than the people who like to give me this advice. So ya know, spare me LOL.

happy out hacking!

But eh. Y’all know how it is. Folks love to offer solutions to everybody else’s problems. And it’s pretty clear that Doozy and I have a Big Dressage Problem. Doozy’s tension is obviously still there in the other phases, but the feeling is completely different. Still at times chaotic, but a whole lot less “IMPENDING DOOM.” The dressage, tho. Oof. You’d think I was asking her to do a 20m circle right around the precipice of an actual literal black hole.

reasons to be grateful: two horses who spent a fair bit of time this year laid up on stall rest, reunited back out on the hills!

Sometimes I have to actually stop myself and appreciate how far she’s come in so much of our day to day life together — how she is in the barn, out on trails, going to lessons and clinics, all the various things we regularly do. Doozy is truly a lovely horse to be around, to spend time with, and to ride in all the various activities I love to do. In company, alone, whatever. 

sweet silly mare

So yea, it bugs me that this one specific activity — riding the dressage test at a show — is so specifically unpleasant and un-fun. Especially when you consider how much we enjoy our dressage lessons lol… Make it make sense!   

might not be everybody’s favorite view point lol but we have fun :)

Trainer C was feeling equally boggled by the whole thing. She only sees us in lessons so from her perspective, Doozy has long since moved on from her earliest chaotic tendencies. And it’s obvi hard to explain just how much the horse changes, turns completely inside out, when we actually enter for our test.

All the same, tho, she was adamant that we keep trying to experiment a bit. Keep trying different approaches, and, yes, still keep giving the horse time and exposure. Bc the horse truly can make a lovely test when she’s feeling secure and game. Plus obvi we still wanna do cross country! And the path to the start box goes through the dressage court.