ground truth

It’s hard to comprehend how I churned out a blog post every day for more than a year. From when I started the blog in August 2014, alllll the way to up until October 2015, I posted daily. It wasn’t until I was forced a bit more onto the sidelines after breaking my leg that I, uh, chilled out a bit on all that. 

These days once a week seems more like my happy place. Except… Well. Realistically this whole blog’s job is to serve as a photographic documentary/archive of my horsey experience… And therefore the number of posts is generally a function of available media content.

bebe crossover!

So it’s been a bit “content overload” the last couple days since I got a new Pivo (omg! better late than never!) and have been busy testing it and trying to get it to work!!! 

And obviously after getting the settings all wrong with our first test, I had to try again right away! 

this is one of the ways we practiced in the recent clinic with Matt

This turned out to be a really great ride to have video from, too, for a lot of different reasons. Mostly all centered around the fact that so much of how a ride feels is fairly disconnected to how it looks. And at least for me in particular, I might diagnose a feeling as one thing, whereas watching back on video, it might actually look like a slightly different issue.

stepping under the other way

Doozy was a super good girl for the ride too, making it a particularly good proof of concept. We started with doing some of the leg-yield-esque steps along the wall that Matt had us doing in our last lesson. In that ride, he had us integrate the steps into the whole session — first walking along the wall, or on a circle. Then also in trot and canter down the wall. 

good girl for playing my stupid games <3

I…. haven’t really gone quite so far in our solo rides, to be honest. But we’ve been practicing in hand daily during our round pen sessions, and then just little steps at a time under saddle. And Doozy is clearly getting the idea!

i swear to god the only thing on my mind in this picture is sitting up tall

She walks out of the exercise feeling super engaged and put together, so usually a nice connected trot transition is right there waiting for us. That’s about as far as we’ve gotten with the exercise, tho, at least for now. 

pivo stuck with us thru this dust cloud, but perhaps was haunted by its ghosts later in the ride since it eventually started losing us here

Mostly bc I don’t tend to do a lot of leg yielding in our outdoor ring. There are usually jumps in the way anyway, plus the long sides feel just a little too long — aka Doozy can get a little strong and strung out — whereas the short sides feel a little too short.

i edited most of the walking out of the video, but we did a lot of it!

And all of that is maybe a bit indicative of our overall trends too. Maybe I start a ride just trying to keep things light and fluffy and relaxed, perhaps sacrificing a bit of connection along the way. But the longer we go, the more tense and tight and choppy Doozy might start to feel. And esp with the lack of connection, she might start unspooling a little bit - anticipating canter, for example or just generally getting tight and braced.

mostly trotting tho, and neck staring obvs

Then maybe I start to feel like she’s running or going too fast, so I tighten and brace too…. And yea you can see where this goes lol. 

why is it that doozy always looks best when i look the most ridiculous? 

What I see in the video, tho, actually maybe looks slightly different. Well, ok, in my defense I was already starting to suspect this particular issue before seeing the video too. In fact, if you had watched our first pivo test video, maybe even you saw the issue as well — particularly when we were working on trying to turn from the rail on a half circle to go down that line of poles.

i’m beginning to realize our lateral suppleness (or lack thereof) might be a main driver to why she feels out of control even when she clearly doesn’t look it

We actually missed that turn, uh, a couple times, and had to circle around to try again. Not bc Doozy was being bad or anything, but bc I misjudged the level of preparation she needed relative to how laterally supple she felt. That experience kinda repeated itself again when I tried practicing riding a figure 8 around the pivo in this most recent ride — a couple times we only really made the turn bc there was a fence in our way.

needs more bend in the body, methinks

So I’m starting to think that perhaps what feels to me like speed and tension might actually just be a lack of adjustability and lateral suppleness. Which, natch, means that my go-to solution of trying to slow the horse down is actually exactly the opposite of what I should be doing: getting her more connected in front of the leg.

the canter felt like a disaster but honestly looks mostly fine

It’s particularly noticeable at the canter too. She feels tight and rigid and hard to sit on, so I keep trying to slow her down more and more. When in reality, her pace and stride length actually look fine. Like remember when I wrote yesterday about how she was able to comfortably do the short 4 strides in between the poles, even tho it felt “chaotic and rushy” to me?

me, sitting up, obvi

So ya know. Maybe most of our issues boil down to the classic case of a rider trying to solve rideability problems by taking away speed, when what’s actually called for is riding more forward, back to front. 

Go figure, the more things change, the more they stay the same LOL.

final trot circuit of the ride looks fairly different from how we start
apparently the pivo got tired by the end tho, started losing us repeatedly in that corner

Doozy did quite a nice demonstration of this for me too, when after we cantered around for a little bit, she was able to show me a much nicer overall trot. Still not perfect, obviously, but much more in line with the feeling I’d like to have.

overall feeling like more video will only help!

The tricky part with Doozy is, as always, calibrating the “more forward” aids without going overboard. 

mostly successful pivo video!

I also want to experiment a little bit with the figures and shapes we ride, obvi maybe with more visual landmarks to help guide us, that are accessible enough to not tempt me into unconsciously trying to slow the mare down (spirals, for example, can be problematic in that regard) but fluid enough to help Doozy be a bit more supple in her steering. Maybe more teardrops or rollbacks?

don’t forget to feed the meter!!

We’ll see. Either way, I’m super grateful for the video. It was kinda one of those rides where I felt better about it after watching the footage, like I understood it better. Or something, idk. 

One of my big goals for the year was to keep investing in our education through lessons with qualified professionals. We were doing pretty well with that too, before Doozy’s injury and subsequent layup. And presumably we’ll get back to more regular lessons soon enough! In the meantime, tho, hopefully the video will be a good source for “ground truth-ing” where we are in the work.

trying new things

Happy Wednesday!! Instead of another meandering quasi-conceptual deep dive into behavioral training philosophies, let’s get back onto a more practical and, ahem, materialistic plane, yes?? 

Yes!

my handsome mare <3 <3 
testing our new stübben bit in the round pen first

Specifically: I finally tried some new stuff this week, and have riding media omg to show for it!!

And spoiler alert::: basically all of it was a (qualified) fail, womp haha.

my handsome…. kitten LOL, and me.
testing our new pivo in the living room first

That’s never stopped me before, tho, so let’s get into it. Bc actually… there was truly a real win underpinning the day too!!

perhaps the living room was not a sufficiently good proof of concept re: settings 

The short story is that I finally tried Doozy in the new Stübben baby pelham that was highly recommended at the Windurra camp. 

Verdict? It’s way too much bit for Doozy right now. She never did anything bad or wrong with it, and it did give me a lot of control. But… I could tell that she was a little worried and backed off. There may be a time in her life where she’s comfortable and educated enough in her contact that she can hold a bit like this, but… for my purposes I want to avoid that ‘backed off’ feeling.

here we are, pivo! are you coming with us??

The other big test was my new Pivo Silver!! Yes yes, I knowww I’m a super late adopter here… But the reviews have always been so mixed, the expectation so much greater than the reality, that I’ve wanted to give the product more time to develop before clicking “buy.”

pivo! c’mon, you can do it buddy!!

Aaaaand… Well. Our first test was a huge disappointment LOL. It performed slightly worse than a $200 tripod — bc it occasionally locked on and tracked for a second without me realizing. So Even as I proceeded with my ride, centering activities around where I thought it was pointing, it still missed a lot. 

apparently you need to actually select “horse” vs “face” in the settings. who knew??

Joke’s on me, tho, bc I didn’t have it correctly set up. Which… Kinda seemed like maybe the case when it kept saying it was looking for a “face to track” and was able to follow me when I leaned over and stared straight into its eyes LOL. But nobody’s ever accused me of being a quick learner, so I’ll just have to try again another day.

still got some video tho <3 also i think this posture is the reason boyd why boyd likes the pelham

The remote worked well, tho! Esp compared to past phone remotes that were fairly unreliable. The bluetooth range itself is so limited (google says typically 30’ but that seems generous), plus many devices seem to need to be paired again after going either out of range or to sleep. 

ideally we’d want a bit more “nose out” but doozy wasn’t quite comfortable enough to push into it

I left this remote close to the Pivo so that it was easy to start / stop without interfering with the Pivo itself — and close enough that it didn’t unpair. And the app seems to keep everything awake even when you aren’t recording, which is nice. Uses up a lot of battery, I’m sure, but achieves its function.

Which like, Step 1 — Do The Thing, right? I want these things to work first. Then theoretically you can optimize for performance (like battery usage etc) later.

regardless, we went through our paces to try all things things anyway!

Anyway I probably spent about 10min fussing around trying to get the Pivo to follow us before giving up and just getting on with our ride. Bc we had important stuff to do!

pivo FAQs suggest keeping the target close enough to fill roughly 1/10th the screen. obvi these gridlines represent 9 equally sized areas instead of 10, but it’s close. i’m not sure yet if this accounts for the pivo’s zoom feature too, tho, bc otherwise you really can’t go very far away at all

Doozy finally gets to do ground poles again, yay!! Much rejoicing!! lol…

Now you may be thinking that ground poles technically *aren’t* jumping, in theory you should be able to just integrate them into your flatwork without meaningful change in the horse’s level of effort / impact / etc. 

omg doozy trotted a pole!!

Which like. Ya know. Maybe that’s true for *most* horses haha, but Doozy is not most horses. 

eeeeeeeeeeee!!! <3 <3

She happens to believe that even the merest ground pole can be quite fun and exciting, thanks! and therefore I’ve kinda felt like we shouldn’t even really go there (aside from at the walk) until I felt like we’d built up to a substantial enough baseline of trot and canter.

omg doozy CANTERED a pole — look at that face haha

So obviously this was always going to be an exciting ride haha. Except — perhaps the biggest win of the day: I admit to being a bit distracted especially by fussing with the Pivo. And recognizing that the pelham wasn’t quite the right bit… Eh, I was basically a fair bit less meticulous / methodical in my approach compared to the last few weeks. 

the most excited mare, doing a lead change bc why not

But… That practice is in the bank now, so to speak. Doozy was solid gold. Game, obedient, connected and with me. Maybe I was slightly less diligent or disciplined with every step, but she met me where I was. Which ya know… is pretty awesome, considering how difficult it’s been to just get her back to “normal.”

i swear this is not a jump… i guess nobody told doozy tho!

I did set up a few visual landmarks tho to help remind me of all my good intentions etc. Specifically, while most of the poles we did were just singles strewn around the ring, there was one line set as a short 4 from a pole to a little box (above). It seemed like the perfect configuration to introduce practicing walking straight before the fence line — so I put two little riser blocks down before the corner to help.

looking ahead at the riser blocks i set up to remind us to halt calm+straight afterward

And it was good! Doozy naturally was very excited about cantering a long straight line with #obstacles lol… but she always fit in the 4 very comfortably (even tho it sometimes felt chaotic and rushy to me) and after repeating a couple times with the halt, was able to do a lovely add stride too.

so good <3

It ain’t much, but it feels pretty good. I’ve written a lot about how I was always in such a rush with Charlie, always trying to grow and advance and move up. And that’s normal, right? I think a lot of us want to see some sort of tangible proof that we’re “getting somewhere” or progressing. 

It just seems, tho, that with horses, you can never really escape the fundamentals and basics lol. 

there’s video too tho i’ll warn you: it’s all in pieces since 

the pivo wan’t tracking us

So in a way I’m grateful to have this phase with Doozy right now, where the pace or intensity of our work is actually a little bit out of my hands. We have plenty of time for this stuff, and it’s honestly kinda nice!

Tho ya know. It’ll be nicer if I can get the Pivo to work properly LOL.

summertime meal plan

Sometimes it’s hard for me to accept that my thoroughbred is actually a little fat LOL. She was so very very thin when I got her, ya know? 

It was kinda the same with Charlie too, especially bc I always had this perverse paranoia that bc of his enormous frame, it’d be a nightmare to put condition back on him if he ever seriously backslid. 

#hillsnacks

As it is, I’m about a decade into proper horse ownership now and am hopefully finally figuring out how to stay ahead of the seasonal nature of management and nutrition. Bc spring grass is one hell of a drug, guys, omg. 

the most spoiled + demanding princess lol

Especially given that Doozy didn’t really lose any condition over the winter this year, it seemed like a fairly safe bet this past spring that she miiiiiight be ripe for transforming into one of those jumbo squishy plush stuffies that are so popular with the kiddos these days lol.

anyway. snacks. Doozy switched to the Tribute Kalm ‘N EZ in early spring

I’m a huge fan of the Nutrena Pro Force Fuel that she’d been on (and that Charlie had also enjoyed for most of his life with me), and would 100% recommend it to anybody with a big or hard keeping thoroughbred. 

I’m also generally reluctant to tinker around with changing feeds a lot. Basically, if it ain’t broke, I’m not inclined to fix it, ya know?

it’s got pretty solid numbers for being low sugar / low NSC, suitable for moderate to hard keepers who may have sensitivities or metabolic conditions

Except the farm where Doozy lives has a pretty sophisticated feed room that’s stocked based on the manager’s consultations with an actual nutritionist, and all options are available as part of full board. So before the spring grass fully arrived, I asked the manager for recommendations.  

basic pellets, we still soak doozy’s feed but it’s probably not necessary

Based on her experiences, we decided to switch Doozy to the Tribute Kalm ‘N EZ pelleted feed, 4lbs. per day split over two meals. It has similar protein levels to the Nutrena, slightly less starch, a lot less fat, and about half as much sugar.

the only way “doozy” and “calm” “kalm” appear together

Obvi as a slightly change-averse individual, I reserved the right to revert back if it seemed like Doozy was losing condition or looking worse or whatever… But honestly I think she looks great! 

Things can change quickly if the grass stops growing — especially around here where that happens often in drought conditions — but there’s plenty of room to increase her volume on this stuff first before we’d need to consider switching back or making any other change.

and let’s not forget the snacks:
platinum performance; via calm; sucralfate (requires vet rx); electrolytes

Regardless, I’m glad we made the decision when we did bc it wasn’t very long after that when Doozy had her accident. Can you imagine what she’d look like on all that fresh grass plus zero work PLUS the normal high octane feed??? lol… 

purina enrich balancer (in the tupperware container far left); purina replenimash; triple crown stress free fortified forage

Especially considering my, um, ahem, *absolute inability* to resist indulging my demanding mare’s every snackish whim. Ahem. 

What can I say? I just like spoiling my animals lol… I’m a huge pushover and Doozy 100% has my number! So snacks are a major part of our daily routine.

guidance calls for 4-6lbs per day as a supplement, but i just use this little bucket

I’ve written about the Triple Crown Stress Free Fortified Forage before, and Doozy’s been enjoying it since early 2025 after I was all inspired by Carly. I especially like this stuff bc… at the end of the day, it’s just forage. Ymmv, but imo for the typical horse without any dietary sensitivities, there’s really no downside and no limit to this stuff. 

Doozy basically has free choice access to the forage at the trailer on show days, and I generally bring a bucketful to outings where she’ll be shipping for more than an hour at a time. It feels like a nice way to make sure her belly is full for travel, ya know?

a typical snack / lunch / third meal, clockwise from center top:
1/3lb ration balancer, small scoop electrolytes, scoop platinum performance, 1lb replenimash

The Purina Enrich ration balancer is also a holdover from Charlie. It’s not really nutritionally necessary for Doozy’s diet, but is a tasty and substantial additive. If I’m just preparing the forage and the balancer, I’ll do 1lb. Lately, tho, since we’ve added the Replenimash, I’ve cut back to about 1/3-1/4lb (or sometimes leave out entirely).

The Replenimash, also a Purina product, is … basically just an indulgence haha. And if you’re thinking to yourself, ‘Wow, it sure seems like she made up for the low sugar / low NSC feed with all these snacks…’ well. You ain’t exactly wrong LOL.

just mix and add water!

But. Eh. My thoroughbred, my rules! This stuff also contains a full serving of the Outlast gastric support product, as well as additional electrolytes etc. 

The final ingredient in Doozy’s Snack Package is a scoop of the Platinum Performance, which as far as I can tell is essentially fancy flax. It’s one of those really solid all-in-one wellness supplements that particularly supports a healthy coat and hoof. 

the forage is best for when she’s going back into her stall for a while, keeps her occupied

The frequency / volume / mixture of Doozy’s snacks varies from day to day. Obvi on days I don’t get out to the barn, she doesn’t get anything at all. 

Otherwise, honestly it’s kinda a vibes thing LOL. For example, I like giving the forage for times when Doozy is going back into her stall after we’re finished, or if she’s going to be getting on the trailer. She gets Sucralfate (via oral syringe) for gastric protection prior to trailer travel too.

regardless, doozy is a fantastic eater, cleans her plate every time!

The big wet sloppy mashes + electrolytes have seemed attractive lately with the oppressive heat dome conditions. I can also imagine the same for extreme winter conditions too. 

Otherwise, a quick scoop of the ration balancer can just be a nice little experience for Doozy, a nice reminder for her that “at least I have snacks!” Or a useful vehicle if I want to give her something like the Via Calm supplement (active ingredient: tryptophan), which doesn’t make much of a difference under saddle for us but helps take the edge off on days when the farrier is coming at exactly turn in / turn out, for example.

she’s a good drinker too, good girl <3

Obviously, tho, the main driver of Doozy’s regular nutrition is forage — plenty of hay (which is grown at the farm) in her stall, round bales in the winter, and grassy paddocks that are rotated carefully and conscientiously throughout the summer. 

The only time she’s ever really lost condition with me was two summers ago, when drought hit hard and early and the grass was dead and gone by August — well before round bales go out. So perhaps my snack regimen now is a bit of an overblown overreaction to guard against that, should it happen again LOL. 

Doozy ain’t complaining tho! But just to be on the safe side, we mayyyyy or may not have just had both her saddles reflocked to ensure a comfy fit at her peak plushness haha. 

not getting desperate

I’m currently reading listening to How Trust Works by Peter H. Kim, PhD, who draws on decades of research in behavioral psychology and social sciences to explore how trust is built, broken and repaired. It’s an interesting read listen if you’re into that sort of thing!

pics are unrelated today bc we’re still doing the same stuff except even less now bc the world is apparently on fire…

I’ve read some of the books he mentions, and so was already familiar with a classic research study he cites, the “Good Samaritan” experiment from the 70s. 

The gist is: Seminary students participating in the study were sent across campus to give a talk (the topic varied, but for some was the parable of the Good Samaritan). On the way, they would encounter a stranger slumped on the ground, in obvious distress. In some cases, the stranger was quite literally blocking the seminarian’s path. 

The study’s striking result was that whether the seminarians stopped to help the stranger was most strongly predicted by how much time pressure they felt. Those who were told to get across campus ASAP were far less likely to stop (in some cases, they even stepped over the stranger to get to their sermon on the Good Samaritan, #irony), whereas participants who’d been told they had plenty of time helped more often than not. 

“stop making me look fat in pictures :’( ” — my plushly upholstered princess in our last session before the apocalypse
related — i’ll have a post up later this week with her current meal plan for those curious

It’s obviously a fascinating and famous study for a lot of reasons, and is referenced in a ton of books on behavioral and social sciences. 

Kim’s finding from this study is that specific features of a situation can influence how we choose to act more so than any individual personality traits. Or, more bluntly, it’s not only possible but easy to get ‘good’ people to behave ‘badly’ with the right situational conditions. 

He concludes that as situational forces grow stronger, our “individualistic” forces grow weaker, and therefore the notion that our characters alone will dictate how we act is simply wrong.

it was another good ride tho <3

Which… Ya know… Is maybe worth mulling over in a variety of contexts — as Kim does in his book on trust. For OUR purposes, however, I had a more topical framing in mind while listening to that chapter on the way to the barn. 

I’m always interested in trying to adapt or apply findings from behavioral sciences to my horsey pursuits. We all know riding is just plain hard, and for a lot of different reasons. And particularly, sometimes it feels like there’s this gaping chasm between how well I might understand a thing, compared to how reliably I can do it. Everyone has a plan until you get punched in the mouth your horse bolts sideways bc #bunnies, right??

So I’m always looking for little hacks, insights, little tweaks or changes to my approach that make it easier to get the outcomes I’m looking for, to establish consistency and reproducibility. To improve the quality of our routine practice etc.

but then… the apocalypse …. oof. no worries, tho, i’m sure more tariffs will fix it! 

So this chapter in Kim’s book caught my attention, specifically within the context of the key commandment that came up again and again across ALL the sessions at the Windurra camp: Don’t get desperate. 

Kim’s conclusions add an interesting nuance to that mantra, right? Which, in case you didn’t read my lengthy posts (lol), came up in multiple sessions including the sports psychology keynote with Natalie Hummel, the dressage demo with Silva Martin and Laura Graves, and the show jump course walk lecture with Peter Wylde. 

Each, in their own way, cautioned riders against getting too sucked into the drama of the moment, letting things escalate or snowball to the point of sacrificing position, precision or intention. Instead, they wanted riders to recognize those moments, take a beat to reset and try again.

 

at least the smoke seems to cut the heat dome humidity??

What the study’s conclusions clarify for me, tho, is that “getting desperate” is generally a function of specific situational circumstances rather than just a lapse in our individual skills or abilities. It’s not that “I suck under pressure,” it’s that pressure — especially time pressure — is a strong enough force to override all my good intentions. 

So learning to recognize that external pressure (time-related or otherwise) in the moment is key. And to take it a step further, it’s worth examining that pressure itself — how much of it is real vs basically self-imposed? Is there a way to consciously design or structure our environments to counteract negative pressure or actually create positive pressure?

Instead of consistently struggling in a given scenario and feeling like, ‘what is wrong with me?’ — maybe it’d be more productive / useful to reframe, asking, ‘what is it about this scenario that’s making things harder?’

For example, I’m a little-too-type-A about all things clocks and timing. Especially when paired with my “overthinking” and “trying to control everything” habits. One of my personality, uh, charms is that I’m kinda always watching the clock, estimating how much time a thing should take, setting expectations etc.

we can still engage the mind with in-hand activities while protecting the lungs!

Just the other day I was literally being an INSANE person overthinking my interval timer app. It’s programmed to ding every 2min for about 35 minutes, and I use it to provide structure and keep track of minutes trotting. 

I was torturing myself tho bc our round pen sessions are ~15min, and the riding session is usually 20-35min… Plus there’s the ‘intermission’ for leaving the round pen, getting on, riding up to the arena, doing a couple laps to settle in, etc… 

And I was going around and around in my head calculating exactly when to pause / resume / optimize this scenario to fully leverage the 35min program, without a lot of fussing with my phone or putting unnecessary pressure on Doozy by thinking that “once I press Resume we have to Go Right Now!!”… 

When… it hit me… Emma. WTF chill out, stop making everything a math problem— re program the app to go for like 60 or 90 minutes and call. it. a. day, dear lord LOL.

pictured: enrichment lol

Ahem. Cough cough. Moving on!

Insanity aside, tho, that realization was a little bit of an “Aha! for Dummies” moment lol. Bc that whole “external forces can overpower our normal inclinations, especially when time pressure is involved” thing works both ways, right? 

Reprogramming the app literally reversed the effect it was having on me — from making me hyper-fixate on ‘optimizing each moment’ to… just taking advantage of the intervals in whatever way worked for us in that moment, bc “we have plenty of time!”

It’s sounds so obvious, like such a no-brainer, and maybe it is. But to me, it was the perfect demonstration of an environment design choice that helps facilitate my best possible decision making and actions. 

we did beautification activities too!!

In the same vein, Peter Wylde suggested using strategically located cones to cue riders for a downward transition mid-course — to enforce a reminder to breathe and reset. 

Matt Brown talked about this in our last lesson, too — that flatwork can be so tricky bc of the *absence* of physical landmarks like an actual literal jump. Which, ya know, is maybe actually why dressage uses ring letters lol.

To me, the idea of deliberately designing our environments to support better behaviors is super appealing. And maybe kinda what last year’s Brit Bot was helping to accomplish too. 

“nbd, some of us were born breathing fire!!” — doozy, unfazed by the haze!

A way to use external signals to help me stay proactive vs reactive, while also explicitly cuing exactly the reminders I know I need. A way to reinforce good choices and make executing on my intentions easier, without needing to rely solely on memory, instincts, willpower or discipline.

Obviously, we can’t avoid negative pressure forever — especially in competitions, when it’s time, it’s time. But we have a lot more control over the circumstances of our everyday practice. So the idea, I think, is to structure practice as well as we can, and use the resources we have available to make a positive experience always the likeliest outcome.

Or ya know. At least until the next rabbit jumps out at us lol….