Monday, January 8, 2018

a conversation with myself, sorta

Me: Alright, I gotta Plan: Let's go school cross country on the all weather arenas at Loch Moy this Sunday!!

Also Me: .....I should probably make sure my truck starts tho, considering it's 10*F and I haven't turned the thing on in weeks. Will test it out on Saturday!

pictured: lovable trouble
Saturday:

Truck: *is dead*

Me: Ok, that was expected. Excuse me, Amish gentlemen working on the indoor who happen to be rolling past in your tractor, but could one of you use said tractor to jump start my truck?

Amish Gentlemen: Sure!

you know it's bad when a tractor can't even get the truck started...
Truck: *is still dead*

Me: ....Well shit. Ok. Guess I need a new battery.

Amish: Sorry we couldn't be more helpful! *rolls away in tractor*

Me: Ok, bought a new battery. Thank the lort I am getting this taken care of today so that tomorrow is still a go!

out with the old!
*Prowls farm looking for anybody capable looking to help install battery. Bonus if they come with truck + tools. Finds said capable guy.*

Capable Guy: *low-key regretting making eye contact* Hm, this is kinda a pain in the ass, but I can do this.

Also Capable Guy: Except damn, this screw is stripped. I can't get it to tighten safely on the new battery.

Truck: *Starts, then immediately pisses out bc of loose connection.*

Capable Guy: Yea you're gonna need a new screw. I gotta go take my kid to lacrosse practice but if you leave the screw here I'll take care of it later.

Me: Ok, got a new screw. Left it with the truck. Fingers fucking crossed when I come in tomorrow morning the truck will run!

pictured: me getting screwed
Sunday:

Me: *driving in to barn at early o'clock in 4*F weather, calling schooling venue.*

Schooling Venue: Yea it's 4*F, maybe don't drive all the way out here today. Shit's all frozen.

Me: Well shit. Ok. Plan B: Go to a dressage lesson at trainer C's barn!! Not quite as cool schooling, but still a good time!

Me: Ya know. If my truck works.

Truck: *Turns on!!*

Me: Fuck yea. Let's get this party started!

Trailer: Ha. Not without lights tho! Which, incidentally, I decline to connect.

Me: Well shit. Did we somehow fuck up the ground connection in the wiring while replacing the battery?? *googles forums furiously*

Truck: I mean, everything here seems kosher, idk what's up with that trailer tho...

you think this is a game? this is not a game! >:(
Me: Ok. I can trouble shoot this. Maybe I'll plug a different trailer into my truck to isolate variables.

Also Me: But shit, I haven't unhooked my truck from the trailer in legit months, this thing is practically fused together. Ugh. *Unloading literally all the WD40 on this thing; beating it with a 2x4; prying the tongue open; biting it, growling.*

Trailer: Ugh, fine.  *unhitched.*

Me: Phew, alright. Let's test this puppy out on my friend's trailer. Christ tho, why is her cable so short? *Takes approx 10 min to get my truck backed up close enough to her trailer to plug it in, bc apparently I'm a little rusty. Whoops?*

Friend's Trailer: Idk what your Cotner's problem is, but look how bright my lights shine!! Even that fussy left side blinker that sometimes doesn't work on your trailer! I also have this fun greasy conductive gunk on my plug that helps with electrical connections, maybe if you were smarter you'd have some of this stuff too?

picture from the last time my brake lines blew.... womp womp
Me: Well. I guess this is a good sign? Let's reconnect to my trailer and try again.

Trailer: Oooh, there's still some of that grease left over in the truck's socket from your friend's trailer's plug. I will now accept your invitation to connect. *Lights work!*

Me: Fuck yea! Let's hitch you back up again and hit the road!!!

Me: *Takes another 10 minutes to get the truck lined up again, bc yea... wow I'm outta practice.*

Truck: *Brake line blows.*

Me: Are you fucking serious right now?

Truck: ....

Me: ....

Trailer: .....

Me: *Rage quits, flips a table over, goes home.*

66 comments:

  1. This is a pretty epic play-by-play, but ouch - that ending is brutal.

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  2. I love me new truck. However. It has cost a lot more than I thought to make it more dependable. 94 f350. She sounds great!! But spouse keeps tinkering...

    I feel your pain.

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    1. yea these trucks certainly have a way of extracting their own pound of flesh!! i still love it tho....

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    2. Lol, yeah. I have a 2002 F250 diesel. Price was right, the subsequent $6K more to... fix oil pan leak, install new whatchamacallits, replace injectors and wire harness, rebuild the jiggamathingie, replace both front brake calipers, install ball in the bed. Oh, and all the tires come off (in case of a flat) because I spent a quality weekend pounding each one off and sanding it and applying tin-man makeup (sorry, I believe it's actually called anti-seize) to it and the hub. And as a bonus, I got it all paid off (finally) so we're all set for adventure if it ever thaws...

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    3. ugh soooo many little whatsits and thingamajigs and whosemabobs on these trucks. and each of them has their own devious plots for spoiling our fun!! >:(

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  3. Those damn brake lines 😒 my old Chevy needs a new battery too. I took it to the feed store this weekend and it *ahem* heavily protested turning over 🙈 at least by the time everything is sorted out, maybe it'll be a little warmer? Trying to find a silver lining for you ☹️

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    1. yea i'm definitely hoping the warmer weather will keep things running more smoothly - tho yea it's totally my bad for not at least running the truck more often even when i'm not taking it anywhere... fwiw, my mechanic is gonna replace all the brake lines with a new type that he thinks will help them last longer. i can let you know more about it once it's done.

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    2. Yeah I think you mentioned the new type of brake line when mine went out last summer. Definitely interested in hearing more when yours are done! We did some repairs but I know another one will inevitably blow in the future. Thankfully that's no longer my horse hauling truck, but I do like living, so functional brakes would be great 😉

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    3. yea ugh honestly i've known for a while that i should probably redo all the lines again anyway, but just haven't made it a priority. i'm super attached to my mechanic but he's pretty far from the barn and the logistics of getting rides and stuff can be a giant pain. but ya know what, emma? the logistics of getting a tow are WAY worse. sigh.

      but yea i'm curious to learn more about what these lines are like - i'm assuming they're still steel or some sort of metal? not honestly sure tho. will let you know!

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  4. I swear nothing turns me into a rage monster faster than electric not working on my trailer.

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    1. omg, fucking seriously tho, right? this new trailer has always been a little loose in the connection, but this was taking it to a whole new level. maybe the lines were also frozen or something? the fuck if i know. blargh.

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  5. Yeah I probably would have blown everything up over that

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    1. i'm honestly not yet ruling that out as an option....

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  6. Just burn it all down, collect the insurance money, and start over. It's your only recourse at this point.

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    1. you might be right at this point. it was a good run, trucky truck but you really let me down on this one!

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  7. omfg. I would have rage quit and flipped a few tables too.

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    1. zero chill over here. zero. ugh.

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  8. Noooo. I don't think your day could have been more frustrating.... Also whats a brake line?

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    1. yea very frustrating. the brake line is basically the pipe that carries the pressurized brake fluid from the pedal to the brakes. the pressure in the system is what allows your light touch on the pedal to exert enough force on the brakes themselves to actually stop the vehicle. so a rupture in that line takes your pressure to zero, leaving you with a pedal that goes straight down to the floor with zero tension, and, essentially, no brakes. it's a pretty terrible dangerous thing if you're actually in motion actively driving on the road.... luckily for me (??) i was safe in a parking lot. still tho. ugh.

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  9. Ugh I hate those kinda days! Hope truck is feeling better soon :)

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    1. thanks i hope so too! my mechanic is great and pretty fast, so we'll see!

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  10. It's NOT funny, but I was cracking up reading the whole thing :) And I'm so glad all the other things didn't work and you weren't hauling C when your brakes blew!!

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    1. i mean, it's either laugh or cry, right??? sigh.... (ok i maybe cried a little lol)

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  11. omg thaaat made me chuckle.

    everything is under a layer of snow and ice and Im just kind of pretending I dont have anything right now. even tho I do. and these are my problems and I bought them.

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    1. ugh yea haha. pro tip: learn from my mistakes and at least test that the truck starts enough in advance from the next time you need it that you have time to jump it or replace the battery as needed! i really need to be more disciplined about starting mine at least weekly, now that i'm not hauling weekly.

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  12. I loled, sorry. If I had been you, I would have been rage crying and quit long before you. Speaking of, I need to start my truck.

    Also real life question what is this grease your friend's trailer has on it? It sounds magikal.

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    1. so i *believe* it's a dielectric grease and my friend thinks it's called nye gel (which a quick google seems to confirm). i'm a little confused by some of what i read bc apparently there are a variety of similar types of grease out there that help protect against corrosion that are recommended for use in things like trailer hook ups. now, the confusion is that some of these greases will apparently inhibit electric connectivity (bc they are themselves not conductive and if you put it in an already loose connection you're just creating more barriers) and some improve connectivity. amazon has approximately 8 thousand options that are all varying degrees of cheap-to-expensive, so i browsed around and ordered something that looks promising. will report back on my experience with it!

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  13. Replies
    1. we basically reached italian opera levels of dramatics over here. a tragic comedy? or comedic tragedy??? the audience gets to decide!!

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  14. I swear to cod, trucks and trailers are more finnicky than horses. I'm hoping my next truck will be new and my trailer could die in a fire so far as I am concerned.

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    1. let me know when the bonfire is planned. i'll bring popcorn.

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  15. Bad brake lines are a known "thing" on full size Chevy trucks (my brother is a GM mechanic). Definitely get them all replaced this time or it will just keep happening (ask me how I know. Sigh!) I'm at least fortunate that brother has a car trailer. I think the new replacement kits are all stainless steel, but don't quote me on that.

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    1. yep i've had some pretty lengthy conversations with my mechanic about this subject. we decided not to replace the other line last year bc after he evaluated it he came to the conclusion that he could not at that time recommend i pay to replace it. but he has since discovered a new way of replacing them (not just putting on the same standard steel line that he did last time) and let me know that we should get the truck in for full replacements. around the same time tho, i needed other brake work done and was wondering if i was actually having problems with the truck being able to handle the tow load. so we held off on doing the lines at that point bc if i was going to decided to sell the truck it didn't make sense to invest in all these new lines. ultimately tho the brake work resolved all the issues i was having and i decided to keep the truck. and i've just been lazy about getting it in for replacing the lines with this new style. but. ya know. apparently the truck has let me know it's time!

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  16. If I'd been in your shoes, I would have lit it all on fire. Eff that shit. I hope you treated yourself to some heavy alcohol and carbs after.

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    1. i'm not gonna lie.... it was basically fireball o'clock for the rest of the day.

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  17. Oh, I am sorry. We had a similar thing happen when I went to XC camp last spring except add in "We're sorry, the tow truck does not service 'remote areas' and we have no idea where that farm is" WHAT? I legit cried on the phone and the lady still showed no mercy.

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    1. ugh that's awful :( i might have been holding back some tears on the phone with my insurance company too trying to get a tow. they were likewise unable to find a provider for me and i wasn't able to even get the truck towed until today, using a tow company my mechanic recommended. such a giant pain in the ass. these trucks are so great for doing all the fun stuff we want to do... but damn if they aren't a huge logistic challenge when they're disabled!

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  18. Whoa you are a TROOPER! You made it wayyyyy farther then I would have in that entire situation. Seriously. MAD PROPS FOR YOU! Better luck next time hopefully!

    <3 Kelly @ HunkyHanoverian

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    1. i have, at times in my life, been accused of being stubborn. but like. dammit i really wanted to go do stuff! :(

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  19. Oh no!!!!!! Apparently this is the month of broken trucks b/c mine is in the shop too :(

    Hope everything works out with your truck and it's back and ready to go soon!!!!

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    1. so far i'm optimistic about it being a quick repair.... but you know how it goes.... sigh.

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  20. OMG nooo!! I'm so sorry :( I hope it at least won't cost an arm and a leg....

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    1. eh i'm sure it will. probably my firstborn too.

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  21. i was ready to pop a blood vessel FOR you haha. damn - sad to hear you didn't get to have an epic xc adventure, but at least the year is still young?

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    1. ugh popped blood vessels errywhere! the year is still young tho, yes.

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  22. I feel so bad for you. I feel worse because I laughed. We've all been there (or somewhere in that realm of suckiness). Hope it gets fixed quickly and you can have more adventures soon!

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    1. i'm hoping it's a quick fix too! we got stuff to do!

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  23. Oh my god. You sound like me:
    Me: I made a plan damnit and the universe is NOT getting in my way.
    Universe: Hold my beer.
    Me: AUGHHHH!

    Love that you keep your humour about it.

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    1. lol, yes. "Hold my beer." that's EXACTLY what it felt like. ugh..... sigh.

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  24. I think I would have rammed th trailer with my truck a few times for good measure. Bright side? It happened in the winter and nitnright before a show? Still sucks awful though :(

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    1. uh.... well... technically we *do* have an upcoming show, with one weekend left to make schooling happen. so. yea it was definitely inconvenient. tho the schooling was cancelled regardless of truck status anyway i guess.

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  25. Oh. My. Lord. I would have just blown everything up.

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    1. ha there's still time for that ;)

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  26. Definitely a day for the bear. (Some days you get the bear. Some days the bear gets you.) Trust me, I know the feels, and you are victorious for not setting everything on fire at the end of that. :)

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    1. ugh the bear *definitely* did indeed get me. and maybe had a good ol' time enjoying the chase too. sigh.

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  27. ugh omg that is a bad day! Almost as bad as me laying in bed all day coughing a lung out :) HA! i kept thinking it would have been too cold to ride anyway right? Poor you you had all the good intentions!! That sucks.

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    1. definitely a bad day, a bad two days actually. tho as far as i'm concerned there's no such thing as "too cold to ride." the horses are fine, it's just up to us on whether we feel like it or not.

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  28. Ugggghhhh to car problems... which is the most bizarre thing you could have get in the way of trying to get to a place where you're going to use another mode of transportation... to go around in circles

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    1. lol i can't say that i consider my horse as a "mode of transportation" but i hear what you're saying. it is in fact frustrating!!

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  29. Oh man did that truck flip you the bird something fierce.

    Or maybe it was lonely since you haven't done anything with it in a while and this was it's way to ensure that you spend more time with it.

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