squircles in new + exciting places

At long last, Doozy met long time dressage trainer C!!!! Longtime readers will remember :D

virtual cookies to folks who immediately know where we are!

One of the hardest things about being basically a "privateer" (ie, a rider independent from any established program) is building up the team, developing the tribe necessary to be successful in any meaningful way. 

And not just because it's hard to find coaching that "meshes," but bc of all the other details... The scheduling, the logistics, the reality that right now my horse is a two-person load job so I can only really ship out to lessons when ideally there are two of us going. Which obvi doubles the logistical challenges!

passive familiarization during punky's lesson was a 100% win

I dunno tho, maybe I also thought we should be 'farther along' before we were 'ready' for fancy pants dressage lessons. But eh, the months have continued ticking on, and we still can't really consistently trot circles.... so, eh, maybe actually this is exactly what we need!

another day, another new ring!

Tho, let's be real. Doozy from two or three months ago might not have been able to do this lesson. We ended up in the outdoor ring (no walls) bc the indoor was occupied already. And it was a non-issue!! Even tho they were bringing in horses from the paddocks during our ride! Good girl, Dooz!

doozy's hind legs are constantly considering their options lol

Trainer C is honestly such a favorite. There are so many ways to ride a horse, so many styles of teaching. But she is just so pragmatic. She just wants to see the horse move in the direction toward better. And wants the rider to be tactical and realistic. 

every now and again, tho, we can just... trot

She has a very stream-of-consciousness style of teaching that honestly feels a bit like 'puppet mastery' when you're in the moment (or at least, in deeper moments of more exciting proper dressage stuff like both Charlie and Isabel did in their time with C...). But she also has a super plain spoken and accessible way of describing things that it's easy to keep her words in mind even long after a lesson. 

"my people, they call to me!" --- doozy, 1,000%

This was honestly a very simple lesson. But it was wonderful. We are undoubtedly well into the 'plateau phase' of kinda sucking while reliably walk-trot-canter-jumping little things. Like, it might be like this for a long time. We might suck at trotting circles for a long time. 

Except actually, there's pretty distinct, tangible improvements happening. Like, obvi not in the trotting circles. Except YES in the trotting circles --- we only accidentally broke to canter like 2 or 3 times in the entire lesson! And ya know. We didn't bolt or attempt to exit the ring despite there being no real actual proper 'boundaries.'

can walk past a gazebo, check!

Trainer C directed us in a fashion very similar in some ways to the Sprieser clinic we went to a few months ago, but perhaps in a bit more of a nuanced sort of way. 

The gist was, as soon as you feel the tempo/pace getting away from you, down shift, Nbd, just bring it back. Don't let the horse get ahead of herself, too big for her britches. Just bring it back right away. Keep it so that the horse doesn't even have the chance to escalate and continue on in the 'wrong' way of going.

honestly walking is a win anyway! i swear we cantered too, but you'll have to watch the video

She quickly put us on a figure 8 of two 20m circles, with a pattern of walking portions of the figure, trotting portions of the figure, but focusing on softness and success. 

And as we progressed, instead of walking every time the horse got over tempo, we worked on the same sort of approach I wrote about last week --- bringing the horse back to almost walk, relaxing into it, then carrying on. Rinse, repeat.

more civilized trotting, just to prove we can

Last part of the lesson was showing C our canter. Which went well enough. I got to sheepishly explain to her how... when Doozy breaks into canter on her own, she never misses a lead. But when I *ask* for canter, we misfire most of the time LOL. Horses will be humbling, amirite?

video to clips from most of our lesson, actually

Overall, tho, honestly, it was a super refreshing ride. So much of it felt familiar with what I've already been doing... Which like, duh, C has been one of my most constant coaches over the last few years, hopefully I've absorbed at least some of it, right?

It was also useful, tho, in settling on specific exercises -- like that figure 8 with many many low-key transitions along the way. And getting the reminder to be more intentional about the squareness of Doozy's shoulders as we go. 

atta girl, dooz!

Essentially, C's instruction was to "never give her the chance to not be good." Make it easy, ride her straight and square, transition as needed strategically. Rinse, repeat forever. 

Except that C doesn't think it'll take that long, she was impressed with Doozy's general choices in life throughout this ride, and agreed that she's generally a well-to-do lady who 'colors inside the lines.' 

It still feels like Doozy is sometimes waiting for.... something, for the other shoe to drop, or whatever. But she'll learn, right? And in the meantime, we'll give her every opportunity to realize, 'it really can be easy, hon!'

another contender

Days go by and I continue to dink around with various trial saddles. Tho, sadly, we've kinda exhausted the available stock within driving distance... and are now tiptoeing into the painful territory of paying shipping for each trial.

oh that innocent (but ultimately naïve) feeling when you first unbox a beautiful saddle!

It's pretty far from ideal, but... eh, so is the current selection of saddles in my tack locker. Charlie's fancy french monoflap helps me feel super secure and up for any dance move Doozy might be inclined to pull.... But it's just all wrong for her and she's making her feelings known. 

My predicament is that... I don't really want to downgrade from Charlie's saddle, but finding the same quality in a fit for Doozy is proving challenging. Especially bc I'm trying to be a little more 'by the book' about the process these days. Meaning: using a fitter. 

just your typical tb back

Long time readers might remember.... Ugh I am kinda a huge skeptic of that whole little cottage industry. Not bc I don't believe that there's a true art and science to fitting saddles to horses... 

But rather bc there's so much subjectivity in the field (I've had two fitters confidently tell me basically exactly opposite things about the same horse), plus a fair amount of dogma. Not to mention how even conceivably 'independent' fitters tend to steer clients toward the same saddle makers. Like, I always think it's funny when a fitter will say, "Oh yea I'm brand agnostic. Here is the universal search criteria for your horse!" and yet somehow only one or two saddleries will pop up in the search results lol....

placement ain't perfect in this shot but, eh, onward!

So ya know. I find myself in an uncomfortable position of paying (out the nose) for counsel that doesn't always feel entirely disinterested. 

But again. I have a good budget for the right saddle, and I want it to be a good fit for this sensitive special horse whose job is to carry me safely through various new life lessons and experiences, whatever may come. Thus, the enlistment of professional help.

My criteria? Monoflap pls!! Bc I like it and I want it, and ain't that enough??? Seat size not too particular, probably 17" to 17.5" -- mayyybe 18" but that might be pushing the boundaries for this shorter-coupled red rockette. 

My fitter's criteria? Wool flocked, narrow tree. 

the stupid faces i make when sitting in a saddle for the first time LOL

Turns out, it's shockingly difficult to find all those criteria in one saddle. I really hoped this lovely old Custom Monte Carlo would be 'close enough,' tho. It's a medium/med-narrow, with gigantic front gussets. 

she's working on her sainthood application

In fact, I found myself quite willing to fall in love with it! Sure, it didn't quite have that "at home" feeling of Charlie's l'Apogee... But I actually quite liked it! And felt quite comfortable. 

So I felt hopeful that any of the little imperfections in fit for Dooz could be resolved with adjusting the flocking. Alas, my fitter felt differently. 

just trotting my bebe wild child around the barn yard in a halter. like one does...

And ya know. Cool. That's fine. If it's not going to work, it's not going to work. I'll send it back, eat the cost of shipping. Eat the (three-figure-wtf) cost of getting the fitter out to do nothing more than say, "No." And resign myself to another evening spent scouring the web for yet another contender to waste $150 and a week of my time on.... (do I sound bitter LOL??).

looks nice, tho, eh?

Tho, don't get me wrong. My fitter was definitely right on this one. I actually knew it before our appointment --- but was just willing myself into hoping for an easy end to the saddle shopping torture. I want to be like water haha -- show me the easiest path of least resistance, and I will happily agree!

But. Eh. My barn mate Amy and I managed to sneak in a quick jump school on a shockingly windy, but otherwise pleasant, Saturday morning --- with the explicit intention of getting as much footage of me in the saddle as possible. 

next up: actual riding!

It was actually a good school too. Useful in a lot of ways. Our first time jumping since Windurra. I wanted to give Doozy a little more freedom to go forward after all the squirreling around on cross country --- but she quickly proved that, no no, she still doesn't know what she doesn't know. 

So after we bolted a couple fences, and she experienced a few distances that were going to be either "dear lord jesus that's long! / or / eeesh that's a crispy chip!" -- including one unpleasantly pulled rail... I kinda got my shit together and tried to, ya know, ride the horse as if my input mattered and made a difference. 

and jompies!!! sorry guys, we had a video malfunction so only my last little course was captured

And you'll never guess. The input *did* make a difference, and Doozy managed to (more or less) trot two fences, and then carried a decent canter to our final little vertical. Tho obvi keen eyed observers will still note that she made a bit of a bid for it in the last stride or two. Eh, one step at a time!

video of our last few jumps 

wherein we practice "simmering down now" after rushing a few 

It's hard to really evaluate a saddle in these conditions --- a rusty rider who... maybe wasn't ever particularly sharp to begin with (lol, sigh..), a horse who kinda takes a fair amount of riding at the moment, and tiny jumps. 

But even so, things didn't look super duper promising for this pretty little Custom. Turns out, there are some things even flocking can't fix! 

So. Back in the box it went, with yet another already on the way in.... Remind me the definition of insanity again??? Lol.....

jumping at Windurra

Happy Friday, guys! I gotta say.... Something has changed in me and my horsey habit over the last few years of Charlie's diminishing soundness and all my related anxieties.... 

she was a little sad about traveling solo after so many rides with buddies

I used to be such a planner, ya know? I used to obsess over constructing these lengthy imaginary chains of dominoes, where each individual ride was interrelated or interdependent with those that came before, and every step built logically into the next... 

but stayed sensible while everybody got ready all the same!

On one hand, that type of framing suits my personal tendency toward imposing order on an inherently chaotic world... Otoh, tho... Well. All it takes is one little domino going askew for the whole plan to get blown apart... Horses will be horses, right? 

And it turns out... I wasn't always super, uh, emotionally resilient in those moments. 

squad assembled!

I came to believe that this sorta external forced 'structure' on my riding habit was a big contributor overall to my anxieties. If every step relied on the steps before, and every ride was critical for accomplishing some future plan, suddenly you're kinda in this inescapable pressure trap, right?

dropping this link to full video here right up at the front

for anybody that just wants to skip ahead lol

Especially in the last few years with Charlie, recognizing that he couldn't really hold up to the heavy lesson schedule anyway, I tried to shift my focus to only really doing things I *wanted* to do. Prioritizing the 'gut check,' if you will. 

jumping little logs!

And I think that new perspective is kinda working well for Doozy!! Like, sure, I'm still a planner -- you sorta have to be when competition entries are due in advance and scheduling logistics are complicated when going places with friends and highly sought after coaches etc...

splish-splashing thru water!

But I dunno. Lately I feel a bit more... impulsive haha. And it's nice! When my friends mentioned they'd be going to a lesson at Windurra with Sally, and wondered if I was interested, my immediate response was, "um YES!"

more little logs! this time sideways!

And when Sally said she didn't have a group for me after 5pm, and asked if I'd be ok riding with my friends (who are doing N/T things), obvi that sounded great to me! 

oooh little black pipe!

I figured it was not going to be the easiest ride basically no matter what, right? But at least if I rode with my barn mates, I could probably grab a couple videos for them, and they'd likely be more sympathetic if we needed somebody to stand with us while others took their turns.

learning to be civil while our buddies came and went for their courses

My hope was basically to practice *existing* out in an open field while other horses galloped around jumping. And maybe to jump a few little jompies ourselves. Splash thru the water... and perhaps play with some little banks!

teeny up bank!

And yay! We did all those things!!

ermagerd teeny down bank!

Doozy's attachment to Rosette has grown significantly in recent months -- partly bc they've spent so much trailer time together (Hunt Club, in particular, really sealed the deal). And also partly bc their herd diminished after we laid to rest to two lovely senior matriarchs this winter -- the bay OTTB + pony dynamic duo you might remember from this post. 

what a good girl tho <3 her sassy side eye kills me lol

The attachment makes everything harder -- bc Doozy is so preoccupied with where she is in relation to Rosette that she's not always paying attention to the jumps. But, eh. No big deal.

not gonna lie, she was a tad unruly lol but so good

Sally's instruction was basically to... proceed. Eventually I'll be able to keep Doozy straight off my leg aids, but for now... The jumps are tiny, the horse is capable, proceed to the fences --- hold on and get there. Time and repetition will be the name of the game.

this fun little sequence from black pipe to up bank was too long for a gif but is in the video

Similarly, generally as soon as Doozy was presented to the fences she'd make a bid for it. And again, Sally said it's just kinda what it is for now. 

and then more little logs!!

The horse is keen and interested in the job, was happy and eager to get into the water and go up and down the little banks. Was only really squirrelly about the jumps bc she was just... generally being squirrelly lol... Plus, omg why are the tiniest log jumps always so skinny omg?! lol...

probably spent about equal time practicing in and out of the water too

But honestly I was still so pleased with the mare. Windurra isn't exactly the place to go for your green as grass horse, right? It's an incredible training facility and wonderfully presented for introducing more technical combinations and terrain questions with forgiving fences... 

There are better places for your sub-N horse + rider combinations, tho. Loch Moy, Fair Hill, Plantation... venues that actually have enough jumps for full elem and intro courses.

good girl, dooz

So ya know. I went into the lesson with fairly low expectations. Just get around, jump some jumps, have fun, be civilized. And we did it!! 

rewarded with trailer #snax

Sally reminded me to use all my available riding tools at an appropriate volume for Doozy to understand -- meaning that she's still too green for me to be really subtle. She doesn't know what she doesn't know, right? But overall, Sally was pretty happy with her too.

all in a day's work!

She's a brave bold little mare, and underneath all the sass and drama and sound effects (omg the whistling lol), she really does want to be a good girl. So we'll take it haha. And hopefully have many more opportunities in the near future to keep chipping away at it!

In the meantime, happy weekend, everybody!

jumping at home

Another day, another grainy video of bopping around cross rails with Mondeuse! I'm trying to make jumping, even just a little bit!, part of our standard weekly lexicon. And I think it's paying off!

for once there are more jumping efforts in the video than are captured here in screenshots lol

Mostly I just need it to feel "normal" for me, ya know? Consistent routine practice, and what have you. Doesn't need to be "exciting." Just needs to happen. 

And I was a big girl for this ride too --- actually dismounted and set a few fences intentionally. Some stuff in the ring had shifted around a bit, making for a kinda weird set up - not gonna lie. Plus lots of combinations, which are fine and all and we certainly need to learn those too...

hard to tell but i made this into a cross oxer with a fair amount of "clutter" in it. doozy didn't care!

But, eh, we were sharing the ring with my frequent riding buddy who has maybe more pressing goals than us (LOL), so I kept our "course" simple. Two X's - one on each diagonal, and one set as an "oxer" (ish) with "fill" (ish). And then a single vertical across the short axis but positioned such that it could be reasonably gotten to off both leads even when jumped in the same direction -- thus giving a little bit of a longer approach / easier turn.

bare bones X is definitely more boring tho, and gets less of an effort

Doozy warmed up well, tho she definitely knows what we do in the jump ring lol. Which, ya know, fine, right? She isn't exactly wrong! So we moved onto jumping our little X's. 

just canterin around!

I was having a little trouble second guessing myself about whether to keep trying to trot fences, or just let her canter. On one hand I really want to be able to find moments to push my hands forward -- which is hard to do when you're trying to hold the mare back. 

On the other hand tho... Doozy still doesn't know what she doesn't know. And she doesn't know about patience yet. She'll only know if I can show her, right?

wheeee, emma canters a vertical!

So I continued to try to trot all our first fences. Which actually, with our recent breakthrough in her starting to understand that, yea, trot is what I want!... Seems like she understood better what I was asking. Like, disagreed lol... But understood. And I generally let her canter to the remainder of our jumps.

And actually -- after one little course from one X to the next where I felt like she got a little too strong to the second fence, we practiced coming back down to trot again after fence 1 -- and it felt like she kinda had a little 'aha' moment with that too.

ok so i legit only claimed 3 single jumps that we just did again and again. was enough, tho!

Then I also opted to do an easy circle to change our lead before proceeding again to the next fence, and again it felt like she understood we were looking for balance.

that tail! fancy lady figured out her auto change in this turn too!

We finished with one last little circuit allowing us to catch the same vertical off the other lead, and Doozy was again quite good - so we quit with that. 

It was a useful ride bc we treated it sorta like a lesson format. Katie would go jump some stuff, then I'd jump some stuff, then rinse repeat, each taking turns. Sometimes, especially when it's a more varied group or different riders doing different things, everybody kinda just catches their jumps as they can through the traffic. But this felt nice and organized and useful for Doozy to practice starting and stopping. Plus obvi we got to video each other LOL.

mane sniffing champions lol, good girl dooz, cantering the same little vertical off the other lead and executing a lead change midair!

And the videos are so useful for me. A couple big takeaways: the mare is ready for a little bit more of a challenge. She's very much interested and engaged in the game, and has a super genuine feeling about the jumps. But -- at least at home -- I think she's outgrowing the cross rails faster than I am. 

Other takeaway: I'm happy enough with my riding. It isn't perfect, but maybe it's a bit self-aware? I can clearly see moments in the video where I'm trying to push the reins more forward, and I'm clearly letting her roll on a bit more. There's probably a happy medium in there somewhere... But it's good enough for getting our reps in.

youtube link to quick video of all our jumping

Ooh, another interesting takeaway --- Doozy got a little tired!! I've intentionally not put much conditioning work into her. Like, on purpose LOL. Homegirl does not need fitness right now lol. But that time may be coming soon. 

I'm thinking our next big focus area will be continuing to grow our hacking skills by introducing longer walkies around the farm. Not just walking from one place to the other, but walking for the sake of walking through all the big fields and hills and whatnot. Doozy seems like less of a flight risk these days so it's the next natural step anyway. 

So ya know. Another good session in the books!

coming into focus

This 'new horse' journey with Doozy has honestly been full of surprises. It's not at all what I expected, and at times it's still really really hard. But she's also been an incredibly rewarding horse to work with, and consistently steps up to the plate -- seems to want to step up. 

farm walkies with Mondeuse!

We are 8 months into this journey together now, believe it or not. And it's interesting to compare with the first 8 months with Charlie. He was farther along at this point, but the contours of our early days also looked a LOT different. 

Recall, Charlie came home to what was basically a new-to-me boarding barn. I'd lessoned there on and off over the years (particularly, pre-Isabel), but we were essentially still new to the community. New horse, new barn family, new everything, had me feeling a lot of urgency to get things moving along enough with Charlie where we could get to shipping out to our normal lesson haunts and start riding with friends again.

nature walkies too --- remember when crossing that little stream ahead of us was a big deal? me neither!

That, combined with Charlie's general laid back disposition, meant that his under-saddle work progressed pretty quickly. And let's be real, here. I was also a bit impatient.

getting acquainted with the fish bowl / water trough

Maybe I felt like I had something to prove? The way things ended with Isabel left me feeling a bit defeated. We had done so much together, had so many adventures. She was such an incredible horse and gave me so much, that when I was ultimately unable to resolve her stopping issue... it was hard not to feel responsible. 

But I didn't own the horse, and ultimately did not have permission to pursue potential veterinary interventions... so, c'est la vie, right? And by the time Charlie entered the picture, I felt bound and determined to "get back" to where Isabel and I had been.

i thought i'd get video of cute splish-splashies,
but instead she just tried to scratch my nice bridle lol

The picture is a bit different now with Doozy, tho. On one hand, we're safely ensconced in an established and wonderful barn family -- with plenty of friends who have happily been good vibe-y riding buddies for a very fresh green OTTB. With so many resources at home, Doozy has spent far less time on the trailer shipping out to lessons etc. 

Meanwhile, I'm intentionally trying to be a little less 'urgent' about things. Originally the idea was that Charlie would keep me occupied enough to protect against impatience, although that has yet to prove true (he's still not particularly sound, sigh). 

can't stand still / won't stand still lol

But Doozy has made her own impressions anyway. She's not really a horse that can be rushed or squished into things or "gotten around" by hook or by crook. Quite a few times now with this mare, my lofty aspirations have crashed down to basic reality. Often in kinda... deflating ways. 

Like a couple days ago, on a gusty windy day after what felt like endless rain... I thought maybe Doozy and I would amble up to the jump ring for a little solo school. Which, eh, we did technically "make it" to the jump ring -- tho "amble" isn't quite the right way to describe how we got there. And I only stayed long enough to do a little courtesy circle by the gate before exiting to immediately head for the safety of the indoor. Where we proceeded to have a slightly wild and wooly session more reminiscent of her earliest rides. 

oooh i bought a pro photo from Hunt Club!! not bc like, we make a nice picture at the moment (hint: if you took away the boards in the background you'd never guess we're mid dressage test by either of our postures!)... but bc hey, we did it! and also grateful for the photogs who stuck around all day lol

The thing is --- there were so many silver linings to that ride, right? Like, first of all, we rode up from the barn, actually hacking successfully to and from the jump ring along the way. Which... remember when Doozy could barely hand walk around the farm?

Secondly, Doozy actually was able to stand for me to open and close the sliding doors from the saddle both to enter and exit the indoor -- a first for her. And then rode back down to the barn post-ride in a very civilized fashion.  

can ride in the rain!

So yea. On one hand, the riding still isn't 'good,' per se, but it isn't bc Doozy isn't learning, right? Like, actually, it feels like she's learning so much. 

Remember when she wouldn't stand still for the dismount? Or when she'd drag me around the ring while I tried to run up the stirrups and loosen the girth after a ride? Not bc she was being bad, but just bc... that's how they did it at the track, right? ALL of that has improved, and not bc I'm some sort of ground work guru LOL, but just bc she's figuring it out.

and we've had LOTS of rain

It's easy to get frustrated and demoralized about the actual under saddle work not being further along... mostly bc, wow sometimes it's just plain hard to work up the mental fortitude for yet another frenzied flurry of attempted trot circles lol.... No joke, I'm grateful every day for how 'easy' Charlie was in many, many ways!

But, eh, then there are the rides where Doozy just knocks me over with a feather, when she proves that, "Actually I'm really trying to listen and give correct answers -- I just need to understand the question!" Like when I finally clearly communicate, Yes we do actually want a slow trot, and then she does it. 

more farm walkies... bc guys, getting proficient at strolling around the farm is a BIG DEAL for us!

Doozy can trot around like a maniac, often breaking into canter at the least provocation. But when she knows I want to walk, I can literally chuck the reins at her and she still transitions down. So... It's clearly just a training issue of her not understanding what we want in the trot (maybe she's a bit philosophical about it lol -- "what's the point of doing it if you don't do it FAST?").

In recent weeks, tho, we've had a breakthrough. She seems to learn the best, go the best, balance the best, when I can push my reins forward to her. Which like, duh haha. But on a horse who wants to get racey and inverted and on the muscle, it's hard to find those moments, right? 

So I dug into the archives to an old Dan C lesson with Isabel where we worked on stretchy trot, and his instruction was basically to sit the trot deeply and slowwwww it down until the horse comes over her back and wants to stretch -- then push the contact forward and post and praise. Rinse repeat forever. And it's working!! Doozy seems to understand!

basically every riding area on the farm requires some level of commute from the barn

Which ya know. Is such a good feeling. Also a feeling made possible by all the other little skills Doozy has learned over the past months -- like how to accept leg aids, how to bend, how to balance, all the things. Just very very slowly introducing her to all the various micro-skills, then putting them together into something that might eventually look like a proper trot.

pretty magnolias!!

The best way I can describe Doozy is that, 'she colors inside the lines.' She wants to be good, wants to learn, and often seems quite interested in the job -- esp if it involves jompies! And she's actually learning some things quite quickly --- it just doesn't exactly look like the Syllabus of Under Saddle Skills that I maybe expected after Charlie. 

So we carry on and keep working on it. With some stuff on the schedule for April that will hopefully address some of the gaps in her rider's ability to establish good under saddle work (hint: lessons, lol). 

It's always useful and exciting to have stuff on the calendar to look forward to, tho I'm working very hard to not fall into the stress trap of zillions of interdependencies, dominoes that have to fall in exactly the right way in order for my plans to work. Just wanna be here to enjoy the ride lol! So we'll see. Anybody else getting excited about the spring season?