friday foto finish

In this week's episode, we see a sculptural representation of Charles, looking like the trazadone just kicked in lol...

"feeling kinda funny, guys!" - charles, usually

"mmmmm tastes colorful"

getting ready to bask in his sedation for a full 45min longer than the vet said haha

This trippy fountain is brought to you courtesy of the Huntington Gardens lol... TGIF y'all!!

westerly wordless(ish) wednesday

Happy mid-week, y'all. Not too too many words today, bc I'm actually out of town so not a whole heckuva lot is happening! 

look closely -- this statuette apparently has an abscess-wrap on his hoof lol

Or at least, not a lot for Doozy. She's getting a little vacation, aside from some extra TLC from barn mates. 

beachy with my aunt!

I figure, she's been working hard and doing well. Plus she proved after the snowstorm last month that she can come back from a break without much fuss. 

the wild west

So, eh, what's another week or so, right? 

garden at the Getty Center was incredible

Charlie, meanwhile, decidedly does not thrive with neglect haha. And in his book, "neglect" means going longer than 36hrs without direct personalized 1:1 attention lol. 

certainly more scenic than late winter mud lol -- see charles spying from the bottom right?

He actually started back under saddle about two weeks ago maybe, very simple rides spent mostly working on lateral suppleness at the walk, with adding trotting very slowly -- a minute or so more every couple of rides.

different day, same charlie <3

His heel bulb wound is almost entirely gone, but recall he still needs his hocks done since he keeps interfering with those plans... Plus ya know, he's been out of regular work for a year. And at the end of the day we just aren't sure how his feet will respond to increased load again.

back to hacking!

But I'm hopeful. Aside from the janky hocks, he honestly feels like a million bucks. 

lots and lots and lots

Like, feels so good that it's easy to get greedy haha. Bc damn it's just so nice to be sitting on him again!

and lots and lots and lot and LOTS of hacking lol

So I'm eager to keep up the (slow low intensity) momentum with him, ya know? 

and a sma smidge of ring work too <3 talented junior got a lesson on him before i left town

Fortunately, Charlie has a LOT of friends around the barn -- and he's reliable enough that it's practically worry free to hand the keys over while I'm away.

and got to enjoy hacking around too

I'm never sure if he's the most classically "fun" horse to ride, bc he can be a little pokey and lazy... But then again, he knows a LOT. And maybe can teach a lot. At this point, basically all you have to do to ride him is hold a steady position with a clear forward intention... And he just... goes lol. 

So... Actually, maybe that IS fun for the typical barn rat junior who always ends up with the surlies or greenies lol.

he's in good hands! and so is she ;) 

All in all, I feel good about it -- and it definitely helps me feel a lot less guilty about leaving for so long (wish the same could be said for my guilt for my two little house kitties who are used to having me home almost full time....). Feels like a win-win, ya know?

So anyway, more news later. Hope y'all are having a nice week!

schooling dressage show

Guys!! Doozy did her first little schooling show this weekend!! My first show since April of last year, omg! Just a little at-home show in our normal indoor lol... So maybe not really anything significantly different for Dooz. But we did it, and we survived! And it was all ok!! Haha....

good girl post-tests, existing out in the open *without* killing anybody!

For real, tho, I'm gonna skip right over our lesson from the day before bc... While it started out really well and we're definitely figuring some stuff out, Doozy's quarter Ran. Out. somewhat unexpectedly about half way thru the lesson and the rest was an absolute wash... 

Like, true story, the lesson finished so poorly that it didn't seem likely we'd make it through the tests for the show if Doozy was in the same condition the next morning... Fortunately, tho, we got a few lucky breaks for the show. 

devil's in the details, like riding with the doors wide open for the first time!

First of all -- I had the first rides of the day, so got to warm up inside the indoor instead of out in the dressage court. Secondly, my barn mate would be right after us -- and she also prefers warming up on the indoor footing. So Doozy had a friend to warm up with inside, which helped take the edge off coping with the doors being wide open omg.

Said friend also parked her horse right in the middle of the doorway for our tests too -- plus there were a few spectators, so we had a nice healthy wall of bodies to prevent against unceremoniously bolting away lol....

getting lectured by the judge for riding poorly. doozy is super cute tho!

With that said, tho, the tests still weren't great. Realistically, we *can* do all the things required by the test, theoretically, but not necessarily within the parameters and constraints of the test itself. Like, yea... we CAN halt... but... mayyyybe not at X lol, ya know what I mean? 

useful feedback from test 1

And we also may or may not have cantered throughout the entire first test --- which, for the unaware, USDF Intro B does not call for canter. Oops. The judge really took me to task for that too -- told me that I was riding too crookedly and that this was why the horse kept stepping into canter, and that I'm basically going to ruin the horse by training the crookedness into her him if I don't fix my shit. 

Which like. Cool. Thanks judge for the deep diagnostic review of my training that you managed to accomplish in the last 2.5min... But maybe just give me the 5 and let's get on with it, yes? Thx. 

doozy kept a lid on it with the help of her emotional support barbie dream horse lol... 
also, my local consignment shop was selling these gorgeous SSG show gloves brand new for $2/pair. sure, maybe the white draws too much attention to one of my weakest areas, but the gloves are NICE

We rode our tests back to back, and a couple more things worked in our favor. First -- I was a bit more proactive about not letting Doozy slide into canter lol. Second, the mare was sliiiightly more on board with riding the pattern this time, just from having accomplished it once already. 

not gonna lie, we did a lot of cantering considering it's a W-T test LOL

There are definitely moments in the second test (video below) that excite me. Sure, it would be easy to get stuck on frustration for when I couldn't hold my position, or when Doozy would invert and run off on the muscle (basically any time we turned toward the door). And esp with these silly bright white (but oooh-so-luxe) gloves, there's no hiding any sins with my hands....

can cherry pick good moments for horse or rider (rarely both LOL).. you'll have to watch the video to see the truth tho ;)

But idk, I kinda feel like if you imagine stepping back, letting your eyes get a little blurry maybe, and viewing this test more from a materiale perspective, it feels like a really solid effort. Like, in each movement we have little glimmers of development. Small moments of give and softness... We just can't hold it right now. Ain't got no rhythm yet! 

always amazed when she can walk out even when super tense

Doozy is such an interesting horse bc she's tense, yes, but not quite in the tight taut way I might expect. Like, she can basically always walk nicely. Even when going from getting cantered away with in a trot circle, to not quite nailing the transition down to walk... It's still fine to push the reins forward in free walk and she just slinks her way across the diagonal in her lovely Doozy way. 

Tho, for some reason we got a 5 on our medium walk in this test. Idk. Looked fine to me, but eh, the judge disagreed** and gave it our lowest mark for the test. Idk, watch the video and lemme know what I missed??

(**Truthfully, the judge was in my sightline and was noticeably not watching us in this moment, but was instead dictating a comment to the scribe. Weirdly, she was watching the scribe write, too, which seemed unusual to me. Found out when I picked up the test sheet, she had the scribe add a comment to the margins about my "tending to tilt left," and in the process missed the medium walk and then trot transition, two of nine scored movements. Opted to dole out a 5 anyway tho! Thanks judge!)

more or less representative

Doozy is just so sensitive right now to where we are with respect to the door, a lot of how she goes is influenced from that draw. It's really up to me to be a bit more proactive about trying to keep things a bit steadier and more in line whether we're turning away or turning toward the door, ya know?

lolz pretty sure this is what the cool kids call crip walkin

We're figuring it out, tho. Maybe haha. Maybe not totally ready for going out in public for real yet... But for a home show? Felt like positive mileage. 

link to video with scores & comments here

And honestly -- maybe the biggest win of the day was being pretty darn mature about hanging out after we finished, while Pride took her turns. 

There wasn't necessarily a TON of activity, but there were a few horses warming up in the dressage ring (including Candee Kisses omg!), plus a few more wandering around here and there... And lots of spectators, natch. 

mare was grown up enough to exist out in the open amongst the spectators and in view of warm up with horses coming and going, while we waited for Pride to finish her tests - good girl!

But it was all nbd. Doozy had exactly zero little episodes!! Progress!! Slowly but surely, we'll desensitize this little lady lol.

So. Doozy's first show is in the books. It maybe wasn't "real" in the sense that, ya know, it was at home in our safe normal indoor. But, then again, it was a real judge who neither knew nor cared about our history and simply judged us as we were. AND it was a heightened and unusual level of activity "at home," which sometimes is more challenging than just going somewhere new. 

Apparently there are ribbons too, 4th and 6th place!! (Out of 6 I think LOL womp...), so maybe Doozy will get her first satin glamor shot soon ;) 

"nobody said there would be ponies"

I've been really reluctant to buy more stuff for Doozy, mostly bc... Let's be real, I already have a LOT of stuff. #borderlinehoarder over here, not gonna lie.

shires 200g neck. would have preferred 0 fill... but for $20 in excellent condition, it'll do!

But I also wanted to be really intentional about prioritizing the stuff we really need and will use. Which I think has paid off. 

Over the last 6 months since Doozy arrived, she's gotten a fly mask, halter, rain sheet and shoulder guard new, and has otherwise gotten all her blankets used, plus all her tack repurposed from Charlie. Except for that used Beval jump saddle she wore for 2 months to get going before she gained enough weight to fit Charlie's monoflap L'Apogee. 

HKM cob-sized leg boots, super airy with lots of protection -- really happy with how nice they look!

I do love buying new stuff, tho haha... Plus got a few gift certificates to our local consignment shop, Maryland Saddlery, for my birthday and Christmas. So I finally polished off the remaining credit this weekend -- with another neck attachment, a nice pair of show gloves, shipping boots, and front and hind boots for Doozy!

Back on Track hind fetlock protection, bought to match the pair of brown Professionals Choice open fronts i already have that fit Doozy...

I'm really excited about those white HKM boots, which will get used for xc and look super flashy omg! Let's just hope I can keep them clean tho.... I'm less excited about the Back on Track fetlock boots tho.... 

fast forward to a post ride pic, however: these are not a fit and will either get returned or sold to somebody else. interested for $25?

They're super pretty and would nicely match the brown open fronts Doozy inherited from Charlie... But the fit is just not right for her dainty little stems... Oh well, it was worth a shot!

all dressed up and ready to play!

Anyway. It's fun to dress this pretty mare up all nicely, esp when we go out in public and kinda embarrass ourselves LOL...

descending into "death alley" following brave Punky lol --- there's just so much stuff down in this little clearing, can be spooky!

Like on Sunday, when we thought the lessons were done for the day, and could not have been more wrong. The jump ring was crowded with kids and ponies and parents and various spectators...

we thought lessons were over but noooope --- there were SIX cantering and jumping ponies in the ring, including Candee Kisses (top right), which blew poor Doozy's brain that her field friend also existed in the riding universe too lol

It was a lot for poor Doozy, not gonna lie. Especially considering one of the ponies is her pasture mate and she got really distracted and magnetized with trying to go say hi. Never mind that Rosette is also a pasture mate now and was with us... That's old news, bc we ride with Rosette all the time... But Candee??? Omg, earth shattering lol.

the atmosphere chilled considerably once the lesson finally ended!

Doozy held it together shockingly well, tho. Like, on one hand I was disappointed bc it was clear that we might have to abandon our plans for jumping around bc of the lesson... But, eh, this is real life and Doozy's got to learn to cope. And she did! Like, sure, we had a couple unexpected dance moves and a few sideways shies and bolt attempts. 

fun with artsy shadow shots lol

But none of it was nasty. And in fact, most of it was more or less unobserved by the crowd, including my riding buddies. Which is further proof that Doozy is learning to be a bit more self contained. Even when I feel her vibrating with tension, she doesn't necessarily look it. Good girl!

doozy's first helmet cam clip!

And ya know, the ponies eventually left after about 30min, and the vibes chilled wayyyyy down in the ring. And our little trio were finally able to fully focus on our objectives for the day. Amy was trying out a very nice trial dressage saddle. Katie wanted to pop a couple fences up to height. And obvi Doozy wanted to do some little cross rails too -- with bonus helmet camera footage!

chillin like a pro after we finished, while i caught video of my friends

It's been a LONG TIME since I did anything worthy of the helmet cam haha... and I'm not even sure this ride really counts lol. But it's a nice helmet camera, I like using it, and maybe it's fun to switch up the perspective every now and again!

also a pro about the hack back down to the barn!

Doozy for her part jumped around just fine. The cross rails were the most boring part of the whole endeavor, obvi lol, but we were able to string a few things together and I'm starting to get a feel for letting her take a more forward step to the jumps so long as she's steady in the approach.

and a pro about this stream crossing too!!

Doozy really impresses me in her ability to recover from extreme tension or anxiety. Like, I'm still sorta learning about what triggers her, how she reacts, and all the related implications and all.... But it's becoming clear that she CAN recover and move on after being upset. 

Sometimes it takes a good long while (like when I hand walked her for 60min at Kealani for her first Sally lesson)... But knowing that a meltdown doesn't necessarily mean game over for her helps give me confidence to be patient and let her work through the new experiences.

she's real sweet, guys <3 <3 <3

So ya know. Yea, my heart kinda sank when we realized the lesson was happening and we maybe wouldn't get the ride we planned... But maybe it turned into an exercise of getting what we needed instead of what we wanted. And we got to do all our little jompies eventually anyway! 

Feels like a win, in the grand scheme of things. And another solid experience for Doozy lol bc that ring was 100% as chaotic (or more, let's be real) as a warm up ring. And we lived and eventually performed! We'll take it lol... 

doozy's dressage thunder coat

Doozy and I finally got back to dressage lessons after a little bit of a winter weather break! And it went really really well. So let's dig into details, yes? Yes. 

unrelated but pretty: dusk vignette

Basically, dressage trainer MP is pretty intensely focused on changing my posture and contact, and it's Exciting!! But also, at times, deeply frustrating. In the sense that... Ya know, I feel like I know how to ride, right? 

More than that -- I feel like I can ride. And this process of getting Doozy "going" has felt validating, esp after so many years of riding Charlie almost exclusively.

rosette and monduese --- two ladies who never miss a meal LOL

But ya know, I have a lot of bad habits, generally not fantastic equitation, plus a few holes in my education for good measure. Part of Doozy's role as my new, next horse is therefore to help me continue that education and break through those bad habits. 

trainer MP snapped a nice shot of us out in the beautiful morning sunlight! this mare is blooming!

So it's kinda perfect that MP is so intolerant of some of those habits, and insistent that I prioritize the changes. But ya know, on the flip side, it's really hard to be effective from an insecure, unfamiliar position, ya know? 

And I hate feeling ineffective -- like it sucks feeling like I can't even trot around this horse that I had going wtc + cross rails before ever having a lesson.

feels like i'm starting to see more concrete shifts in my posture -- finally!

And it felt like that frustration was translating through to Doozy too -- that, through the course of a lesson, we'd sometimes become increasingly tense and braced against each other. A feeling I hate. Like I was changing the rules, moving the goal posts, but not quite holding up my end of the bargain in terms of stability or timing in the release. 

this would have been a "great for us" moment a couple weeks ago, but was actually only kinda mediocre for this ride! progress!

So. Back to the little winter weather break from dressage. Recall Doozy went to her first jump lesson with Sally, which was excellent, then we got hit with back to back snowstorms and Doozy ultimately got about a week and a half off from under saddle work. It felt restful. 

And even better -- getting back to business when the weather improved was drama free. Doozy picked right back up where we left off, minus some residual tension. And since then, I've prioritized relaxation in our rides, potentially at the expense of some of the connectedness MP has been coaching us into.

mare can WALK

PLUS. I started riding Charlie again --- more on that later. But the short story is, homeboy trots like a metronome <3 <3 Which helped me realize just how much of Doozy's erratic trot rhythm is really... my fault lol. First bc I just haven't been able to enjoy consistently riding a steady trot rhythm since... before Charlie's catastrophic hoof injury. Secondly, tho, Guys holy shit I'm weak AF right now, and have no muscle memory for strength / balance in this new posture.

It's easy to miss that weakness when I'm feeling braced and defensive with Doozy. But on Charlie, where I'm relaxed and right at home, it's been a bit eye-opening to feel moments of slippage or imbalance.

postural changes still a work in progress obvi -- pictured: me reverting to a defensive stance -- but i'm feeling optimistic

So. Back to this weekend's lesson. I fixed my attitude and perspective to really lean in to MP's directions, while still prioritizing finding moments of softness and release within the correct posture. As in, learn how to give without floating my elbows or pitching my upper body forward or throwing my whole posture away. 

And I also wanted to be more open minded about the erratic moments, recognizing that... as far as Doozy is concerned, *I'm* the erratic one lol. She wants me to be her thunder coat but suddenly I'm all over the place.

i feel like there's gonna be a big moving horse in here when i finally get my shit together

MP had me continue to work on the idea of using lateral suppling to bring Doozy onto the aids, even just a few steps as needed. And it's really starting to click for Doozy too, now that she's better at understanding that my leg means something and is there for her -- not something she needs to bounce off of. 

trying to get a feel for moments of softness and release even as i try to be her "thunder coat"

Bc actually, it feels like Doozy does her absolute best when I use a shit ton of thigh - something I noticed doing spirals in the Sprieser clinic. It was wayyyyy more inseam contact than I've ever needed for Charlie. 

And I don't even know if it's that contact that Doozy appreciates --- or if it's just that the thigh contact helps *me* anchor the rest of my posture? I don't even know. Except that, for now, that seems to be a big ingredient in our primordial ooze / secret sauce.

ok so we need to practice halts on the center line LOL but we got there eventually

And somehow, out of sorta nowhere, we found our trot again in this lesson. Like, not perfectly, not immediately, but then *bang* -- mare shifted gears, got suuuuper round, and actually seemed like she wanted to walk, like I had to add leg. But then she held it! Like she just sorta figured out how to push into round instead of pull onto the forehand. Wowee. 

It felt so good that MP immediately directed me into running through Intro Test B! We actually rode through the test twice --- all photos are from the second run through that MP videoed. By which point we naturally had lost some of the good vibes. And naturally riding a test makes it even likelier that I'm going to sacrifice posture for expediency... 

also unrelated but pretty: full moon!

But even recognizing that the pictures don't reflect our best moments from the lesson... they're still way better pictures than I'd have even thought possible from our pre-break lessons. 

Plus, as usual, the pictures and video are super helpful to study in comparison to the feelings I had in the ride. To help understand what's working, and how to keep pushing. 

So. We're back on the bandwagon, and feeling really good about it. And MP wants us to do a test at our farm's upcoming schooling show haha. Which, obvi, why not, let's give it a go! Wish us luck?