tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post7591114642329808347..comments2024-03-29T06:50:02.941-07:00Comments on 'Fraidy Cat Eventing: nobody makes me bleed my own blood!!emmahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comBlogger24125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-54684094127762959172019-10-22T08:48:05.228-07:002019-10-22T08:48:05.228-07:00I think you're onto something regarding doldru...I think you're onto something regarding doldrums. Even in the realm of clinical psychology, cognitive and behavioral therapies (translate: changing thoughts and behavior which in turn improve emotional well-being) are strongly supported by experimental studies. There is still so much we don't know about the entire spectrum of depression, but attitude and action certainly affects it. <br /><br />I've been researching the growth mindset versus fixed mindset. Dr. Carol Dweck brings up depression in her book The Growth Mindset and basically says that depressed people or people who are experiencing negative emotions feel the same feelings, but they choose to act on them differently. The people who get up and function through the discomfort experience a better general well-being despite their problems. <br />It's all very interesting. Resilience is so important!Jenna Blumerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16415862271375573914noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-32655208096701217812019-10-20T14:27:58.747-07:002019-10-20T14:27:58.747-07:00This summer I went out and Showed My Horse at the ...This summer I went out and Showed My Horse at the lame little local dressage show series. At, yes, super-dumb beginner Intro B and Intro C tests. But I went to the three outings and I actually had OK scores at them. I learned to breathe in the ring. I got the go-ahead (from regular instructor and regular clinician) to move up to Training tests over the winter because really we can reliably do all the stuff in Intro at a solid level of doing and it is now too easy for us. The advice from the tests (Use Aids To Get More From Horse) was, once I stopped being angry at it, helpful as all hell. After a month and a half of Actual Marching Walk, horse is visibly bigger and more muscular about the hq. He's also more forward, more reliably. I've stopped grinding with my heel (!!). <br /><br />Last year really, really sucked for me on the horse front and I was quite depressed by spring... so I made a simple, clear goal that I could work towards. Go to the three little local shows. Do the Intro B & C tests. Actually work on this instead of (or more-realistically, WHILE) crying all the damn time about the dead baby horse and the dead mare. It helped, some. I don't love showing at the best of times and I still cry. But having a goal got me out of the house and riding my not-dead horse and so it was, on the whole, a good thing.<br /><br />For the winter, we're going to take another stab at a spring 30-miler. That will give me something to ride towards over the cold months. Here's hope for a not-very-snowy winter!!which_chickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10944558109074440312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-84984917296343759322019-10-18T07:23:46.513-07:002019-10-18T07:23:46.513-07:00I feel ya on both sides! I've been out of the ...I feel ya on both sides! I've been out of the game so long, it's really kind of scary to jump back in. So many reasons not to. But once I have a sound horse and can jump enough fences in a row without almost dying, it will be time. Gotta face those anxieties and show them who's boss! And the more you do the better it gets so long as you don't let the mistakes steal your focus. Good for you for getting back out there and enjoying your horse!Stacie Seidmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11421021003654717894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-14443022643744638622019-10-18T06:41:07.469-07:002019-10-18T06:41:07.469-07:00I've re-watched that Boyd Martin video a bunch...I've re-watched that Boyd Martin video a bunch of times and it never gets old. Seriously motivating. We all get in that headspace and I think that's ok. Hell, I'm in it now. But you and C have come so far and will only continue to get better. And I have no doubt you WILL move up and it will be sooooo sweetAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-8568099839622752852019-10-17T10:28:49.426-07:002019-10-17T10:28:49.426-07:00k, but that ear bonnet tho
it took me wayyyy long...k, but that ear bonnet tho<br /><br />it took me wayyyy longer than necessary to figure out it is indeed pasted on the bonnet and not photo-shopped in, haha. Cathrynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15652933884652697666noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-61480752296273746522019-10-17T05:11:16.340-07:002019-10-17T05:11:16.340-07:00Thanks for sharing. Glad to hear you are doing bet...Thanks for sharing. Glad to hear you are doing better and you are Mr. Charles are getting out for some adventures together. Laurahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07940386405998853917noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-84521000874688310802019-10-16T17:38:44.812-07:002019-10-16T17:38:44.812-07:00Sometimes we are crazy similar haha.
I am the que...Sometimes we are crazy similar haha.<br /><br />I am the queen of talking myself out of things with the what ifs and it only makes me feel worse.Eventer In Progresshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01188223824498672612noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-88339553553051971102019-10-16T15:51:44.135-07:002019-10-16T15:51:44.135-07:00Yay for wanting to do the things!!
And... you'...Yay for wanting to do the things!!<br />And... you're lucky to live somewhere where you have so many options! It doesn't have to be only horse trials- it can be trail rides and paper chase hunter paces, and hunter trials. All so valuable in so many ways, but without the financial commitment of doing a horse trial. I'm hoping you have the best fall EVERnadiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08290914277204973015noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-55067044418047515782019-10-16T11:25:53.388-07:002019-10-16T11:25:53.388-07:00Thanks for sharing <3 It's so easy for thin...Thanks for sharing <3 It's so easy for things to become self-fulfilling prophecies, and this is a good reminder to identify and break that cycle if/when necessary.Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04292565760924146966noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-87486651353191624792019-10-16T10:19:28.364-07:002019-10-16T10:19:28.364-07:00Me, me! I need to turn over a new leaf!
Thanks fo...Me, me! I need to turn over a new leaf! <br />Thanks for the inspiration. Loving your attitude and loving the continued use of Charlie's lightning bolts hat too :)Thttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05438372155463437107noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-50952101312098540212019-10-16T09:40:37.095-07:002019-10-16T09:40:37.095-07:00Dude just the intro to that video was inspiring! Y...Dude just the intro to that video was inspiring! Yay I am happy for you, it can be tough to climb out of a funk or even recognize when you are in one and you are doing something positive, putting one foot in front of the other. You and Charlie are a great team and you've already done enough to be proud of, so don't worry you won't be a failure and your partnership will continue to grow.L.Williamshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05052638724440787772noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-45800687847010610442019-10-16T08:55:33.765-07:002019-10-16T08:55:33.765-07:00I get this, even though I tried REALLY hard, that ...I get this, even though I tried REALLY hard, that big fat goal of the AECs caused some serious anxiety in me and made my body do things it hasn't done in a long time, and not in a good way. Since actually meeting that goal I've been burnt out- so I am also in the I-don't-wanna bus. I'm going to let myself ride it for a little while then think about starting back up... which I think is ok! We can't be go-go-go all the time!Britt at Red on the Righthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11199502848495130670noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-59241707619646441042019-10-16T08:43:22.362-07:002019-10-16T08:43:22.362-07:00uncertainty is the absolute worst, worse than so m...uncertainty is the absolute worst, worse than so many other emotions i think. i hate not knowing the answer, not knowing if what i'm doing is "right" or "wrong." tho luckily with horses, there honestly seems to be very very few truly WRONG ways of doing things, and many RIGHT ways. in Amber's case, there's pros and cons to every choice around her lifestyle, but it seems like you're doing your absolute best to make sure you're supporting all her needs. and that's basically the best we can do, right? emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-1517635842876916072019-10-16T08:41:48.562-07:002019-10-16T08:41:48.562-07:00yea, that's the great thing about horses tho i...yea, that's the great thing about horses tho is how much they can teach us in recognizing those negative patterns and refocusing on what's really important!emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-90420484062537901022019-10-16T07:33:38.957-07:002019-10-16T07:33:38.957-07:00I totally feel you. <3 this 100%. That circling...I totally feel you. <3 this 100%. That circling wheel of knowing you need to do something, feeling anxious about it, then not doing it and then feeling even worse for not getting out there I can so relate to. It's so hard, and yet sometimes we just need to kick ourselves in the ass and make ourselves get out there. Even though I get to ride Amber now, I STILL doubt whether I should be doing it. I'm happier, SHE'S happier, but really is this the right thing?? I've tried to be positive, like "oh, she's feeling better today" but then I worry I'm still aggravating her... Ugh, never goes away. It's that vicious circle haha. So, I try my best to ensure I just pay attention to what she's telling me, and enjoy that I get to ride her again at all lol Mandyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14485570296592298816noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-72754537025777214272019-10-16T07:12:51.012-07:002019-10-16T07:12:51.012-07:00omg i know exactly what you mean tho about the dou...omg i know exactly what you mean tho about the doubt of "is this just the anxiety talking tho?!?" <br /><br />honestly tho i think it's so so so important to sit back and ask ourselves if this is really what we want, esp as it relates to something like horse showing. i know countless examples of people who show bc they think it's what they "should" be doing or "should" be wanting, or like you say feeling like there's something to "prove," and that's a fast track highway to stealing all the joy out of horses. <br /><br />the bar i ended up setting for myself this summer when it came to entering shows or whatever was, is my answer to doing this a resounding "HELL YES!"?? and.... if not? then that's not good enough. if it wasn't a HELL YES, then it was basically a no. so i took that break. for me, the break eventually showed me that i DID want to get back out there, but i had to do so carefully and for the right reasons for me personally. regardless, tho, it took stepping away to figure some of it out. here's hoping your new leaf brings clarity too!!emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-31521399371958560812019-10-16T07:05:10.596-07:002019-10-16T07:05:10.596-07:00My new leaf is the complete opposite. I'm in a...My new leaf is the complete opposite. I'm in a place I never thought I would be. I don't want to compete anymore, and don't see that changing in the future. Some of it has to do with monies, ofc right? but also realizing I don't need to prove anything to myself or any one else. That is new for me to not want to get out there and see what I can do. <br /><br />...Hopefully it isn't really just the Angst running amok though....Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-88090888332403952492019-10-16T06:48:35.458-07:002019-10-16T06:48:35.458-07:00Oh, for sure! This sport is so hard, physically an...Oh, for sure! This sport is so hard, physically and mentally. I think sometimes you have to hit that emotional rock bottom before you're like, wait, wtf am I even doing here? Promisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12338935046262804307noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-1245158602231102492019-10-16T06:40:44.370-07:002019-10-16T06:40:44.370-07:00ugh the doubt is SO unproductive, it drives me cra...ugh the doubt is SO unproductive, it drives me crazy. and yet it's so hard to get rid of it. even as i find myself encouraging all my friends to just get out there and have fun, i couldn't take my own advice. so obnoxious. anyway tho, we do what we can to fix it, right? and i'm so glad your new trainer has helped you get excited about doing all the things now too!! :Demmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-81153519232773819992019-10-16T06:39:39.489-07:002019-10-16T06:39:39.489-07:00ugh yea i feel like we always have to somehow keep...ugh yea i feel like we always have to somehow keep digging that hole deeper before we realize we're going the wrong direction, right?? emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-68025343921342673422019-10-16T06:34:18.463-07:002019-10-16T06:34:18.463-07:00ha definitely not masochists, no way, nuh uh, how ...ha definitely not masochists, no way, nuh uh, how could you even think that?!?! lol... ;Pemmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-65785360038001386922019-10-16T05:17:26.863-07:002019-10-16T05:17:26.863-07:00I basically lived in doubt the entire last year wi...I basically lived in doubt the entire last year with gem and first year with Eeyore. It isn’t a fun or productive place to be. Trainer AB has been slowly chipping away at that for me and I’ve found that going and doing is really the best medicine. Glad you are getting back out there and enjoying it!!!! Also, love those lightning bolts on the ears. Sarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03346020257901575574noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-30900471033067243122019-10-16T04:55:07.202-07:002019-10-16T04:55:07.202-07:00Ugh, those doubts can definitely creep in and take...Ugh, those doubts can definitely creep in and take over, don't they? It can be so hard to dig your way back out of that hole, but I'm so glad you're finding your way!Promisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12338935046262804307noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-63436923836825535092019-10-16T03:08:39.258-07:002019-10-16T03:08:39.258-07:00I ❤️ This so much. Horses definitely teach resili...I ❤️ This so much. Horses definitely teach resilience. Or else we’re masochists and THAT can’t be true. Right? TeresaAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05311118900077951863noreply@blogger.com