tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post3049591643367491614..comments2024-03-26T17:31:58.290-07:00Comments on 'Fraidy Cat Eventing: A different take on goal settingemmahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-82022097740169961692018-11-28T07:16:10.778-08:002018-11-28T07:16:10.778-08:00As soon as I read it I knew I wanted to write some...As soon as I read it I knew I wanted to write something on it also because it resonated in a lot of areas for me! Still working on it... ;) but I was excited to read this because giving your take & experience on how the growth mindset stood out to you (and the image vs. reality idea) helps me/everyone see multiple perspectives on something and brings more depth to specific partsLiminal Lizzyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06645343664339371495noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-50696691187650076222018-11-26T13:45:55.280-08:002018-11-26T13:45:55.280-08:00definitely. kinda like how we can all read the sam...definitely. kinda like how we can all read the same thing and perceive it slightly differently. i really appreciated tho that someone who has reached such a high level felt secure enough to share their own journey in this way! it helps keep the conversation going!emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-80907443860464347812018-11-26T09:23:03.777-08:002018-11-26T09:23:03.777-08:00There are so many really great books, articles, an...There are so many really great books, articles, and speakers on what goals and the process of achieving them can do for us good and bad. Like with anything though we really need to find the parts that speak to us on our own journey since no two journeys are the same.L.Williamshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05052638724440787772noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-84125490246118118382018-11-26T07:53:53.069-08:002018-11-26T07:53:53.069-08:00oh man, agreed 1000%!! obvi charlie's rehab fr...oh man, agreed 1000%!! obvi charlie's rehab from surgery wasn't anywhere close to what you're facing with P, but we still spent a fair amount of time limited to the walk, and then slowing reintroducing trot etc etc etc. and while a lot of that involved easy mindless hacks, like you i also took it as an opportunity to "restart" charlie in some of his basics. and it really made a huge difference! he came back from that rehab stronger and better schooled than ever before. hopefully you get the same results with P!!emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-58699039366926037512018-11-26T07:49:45.790-08:002018-11-26T07:49:45.790-08:00I read the article when it was posted and loved it...I read the article when it was posted and loved it. Unless I'm careful, I tend to focus on outcomes vs the process. It's bad. Like with P rehabbing, for awhile I was just going through the motions- walk/trot/walk/trot. But as it's dragged on (and on and on and on), I'm now treating it less like a mindless walk in the arena and more as solidifying the basics. Can never have too solid of basics, right?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-33867154706611044272018-11-24T15:34:15.435-08:002018-11-24T15:34:15.435-08:00glad you enjoyed it too!! and yea it's definit...glad you enjoyed it too!! and yea it's definitely crazy how many of those "bad habits" are ... ya know, super relatable. but i think that's what i liked so much reading this from the perspective of such a highly accomplished rider! if even the greats can feel this way, then that definitely means it can't just be me haha. which, in a way, is a helpful thing to know in a weird way!emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-57668642940554641432018-11-24T15:32:30.358-08:002018-11-24T15:32:30.358-08:00oh man, we are all so so so so so SO hard on ourse...oh man, we are all so so so so so SO hard on ourselves, i think. the act of blogging can be extremely useful for being thoughtful and reflective, but only if we can resist the urge to put too fine a point on our own self-evaluations... this idea from Matt of focusing on process v outcomes i think might help a lot with that! emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-43088712884182984152018-11-24T10:14:27.210-08:002018-11-24T10:14:27.210-08:00Thank you so much for this! I just read the articl...Thank you so much for this! I just read the article, and wow, lots to ponder there for me. I have a feeling I should bookmark both this post and his, so many excellent tips and thoughts.It's kind of scary how many of those not so great habits I indulge in every day.Thttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05438372155463437107noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-92088243194420911882018-11-23T15:18:19.381-08:002018-11-23T15:18:19.381-08:00I am going to read this article. I loved your reca...I am going to read this article. I loved your recap and I think it's a great thing. I've been kind of hard on myself for not getting farther this year. I think that this approach is probably more likely to lead to less stress for both of us. TeresaAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05311118900077951863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-65390605773801163072018-11-23T13:01:11.647-08:002018-11-23T13:01:11.647-08:00i was honestly surprised by how great it was, and ...i was honestly surprised by how great it was, and have been keeping it bookmarked ever since bc i knew immediately that i wanted to write about it. looking forward to the future series installments too!emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-37514124697312136692018-11-23T13:00:35.508-08:002018-11-23T13:00:35.508-08:00i think one of my favorite things about horses is ...i think one of my favorite things about horses is that they can, even through the most unexpected channels, help us try to improve ourselves and become better and happier.emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-38402410046828709972018-11-23T12:58:59.520-08:002018-11-23T12:58:59.520-08:00aw thanks. it's definitely the attitude i'...aw thanks. it's definitely the attitude i'm trying to work towards, altho i will fully admit that it doesn't always (or even necessarily usually) come naturally. but that by working out those thoughts and ideas here in my writing, i can usually arrive at a better mindset.... as always, tho, it's a process haha. <br /><br />and i hear ya on not being totally in line with the idea of goal setting and horses. i usually go about it by thinking, 'what would i like to be doing with my horse today? tomorrow? next month, next year? and what needs to happen to get there?' it's a useful exercise for me bc i tend to appreciate structure in my life, routine etc. and that if i can flesh out that scaffolding clearly enough, it can help inform even the most mundane question of "hm, what am i going to do in our ride today?" so that's just one of many reasons i really appreciate goal setting activities. emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-62212568841649334922018-11-23T12:56:11.142-08:002018-11-23T12:56:11.142-08:00omg that's exactly it: that by becoming so fix...omg that's exactly it: that by becoming so fixated on the "plan", our only option when the plan fails is to become depressed. ugh. i know that feeling way too well, and i know you do too. it's an ugly cold place. so yea. this article is a really really useful reminder for me to work harder to focus my effort and energy on the pieces realistically within my control...emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-81415497439238733822018-11-23T12:54:15.551-08:002018-11-23T12:54:15.551-08:00it's such an important conversation too. it...it's such an important conversation too. it's always amazing to me how horses as a sport in general can teach us so much about our mentalities and how to face life's biggest challenges...emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-44570412304279374382018-11-23T12:53:18.092-08:002018-11-23T12:53:18.092-08:00for sure! i naturally have somewhat of a "pro...for sure! i naturally have somewhat of a "process oriented" way of thinking anyway, but definitely breaking issues down into their component parts and trying to troubleshoot through them is SO MUCH KINDER to ourselves than just being like, 'whelp i guess i just can't do that....'emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-78989255385419405512018-11-23T12:52:11.162-08:002018-11-23T12:52:11.162-08:00oh man, yea it can be so so hard to stay motivated...oh man, yea it can be so so hard to stay motivated without some sort of Big Thing to work toward... emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-50334605621665872732018-11-23T12:50:12.683-08:002018-11-23T12:50:12.683-08:00it's definitely hard sometimes, but so worth i...it's definitely hard sometimes, but so worth it when i really try! agreed tho that trying to adjust my mentality has also helped me to stay happier with whatever comes my way. emmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05686949099663199382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-81858560497842487122018-11-23T12:22:50.893-08:002018-11-23T12:22:50.893-08:00I really loved the article too.I really loved the article too.Boss Mare Eventinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08039910692009593158noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-41581586567837873182018-11-23T11:29:51.977-08:002018-11-23T11:29:51.977-08:00I read the article a few days ago and thoroughly e...I read the article a few days ago and thoroughly enjoyed it. The fixed vs. growth mindset really spoke to me bc though I tend to be a very growth oriented person, and in most aspects of my life I have a growth mindset, in horses I tend to have a fixed mindset - and have a lot of feelings of inferiority and insecurity. I'm working to change this. Erikahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04862898176284766826noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-89820364693461332152018-11-23T09:33:41.741-08:002018-11-23T09:33:41.741-08:00Great article and perfect timing. Your own posts r...Great article and perfect timing. Your own posts regarding the difficulties when Charlie decides he needs a break for work and achieves it through..um..creative ways (no more splint injuries or mulch abscess!) were eye opening for me. You always took it in stride, regrouped and moved on. Or at least that is what t seemed in your writing. <br /><br />I’m not a goal setter which sounds awful to write out but is true. There are overlying things I would love to do in life but with horses I take it as it comes. I find when I try to set goals I get stuck in my head way too much and every ride sucks because it needs to be a and I’m getting b. Sarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03346020257901575574noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-59819908017685702152018-11-23T07:46:19.909-08:002018-11-23T07:46:19.909-08:00I love the article. I'm very much of a fixed m...I love the article. I'm very much of a fixed mindset, and so I loved his explanation of growth mindset and how much healthier it is. I think it's so easy to what I call, spiral, when things don't go as planned. We can spend so much time thinking about the plan, working towards the plan, and as he did, letting it consume your life, that the only realistic answer to the plan failing is to become depressed. I applaud his candor as well as his perseverance. He's a role model for surenadiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08290914277204973015noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-44427567853368244342018-11-23T07:35:11.919-08:002018-11-23T07:35:11.919-08:00It hit a little too close to home for me. Not that...It hit a little too close to home for me. Not that I'm struggling with my place on the Team or anything. But I've really been working hard on my mental game. And I've noticed it seems everyone out there is too. We all seem to think we aren't good enough and are struggling. Well like 90% of us. But I like that is a conversation that is happening. Laur @FMHHhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04978311855305167845noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-23747245880104071142018-11-23T06:42:28.919-08:002018-11-23T06:42:28.919-08:00This article was so perfectly spot-on, especially ...This article was so perfectly spot-on, especially after just writing my own series in a similar vein. I'm really excited to see the other posts he writes if Part One is this good! <br /><br />I kind of adopted that growth mindset last winter without knowing that it was a "thing"...it's been a tremendous help, and I hope to keep it up and build from there. Starting to look at "problems" in my riding as challenge to overcome has helped keep things interesting instead of dragging me down into the whole "ugh I suck" mindset.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01027506283334634298noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-5493821323140168992018-11-23T06:17:21.266-08:002018-11-23T06:17:21.266-08:00I read this article too and it really resonated wi...I read this article too and it really resonated with me. I am very goal oriented, and can sometimes find my motivation to ride dwindling when I feel like I am not accomplishing enough toward my goals. Also, I liked the idea of a growth mindset instead of a fixed one. Instead of constantly working to prove that you are good enough, smart enough, talented enough, etc., view each mistake and victory as a growth opportunity that is helping you become better. Nicole Chttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08609448461734913799noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-932439930694780998.post-86194101650034621332018-11-23T05:19:38.704-08:002018-11-23T05:19:38.704-08:00What a great piece! Thank you for sharing it. I to...What a great piece! Thank you for sharing it. I totally agree that being happy with the process/having process goals is so important. I've found that doing this and maintaining a growth mindset, while incredibly difficult some days, keeps me so much happier in the long run. <br /><br />And to the point about being like the happy people in photos...the photos I most love of others are the ones where they are smiling so big in the middle of their dressage test/jumping round/xc run/50-mile attempt. Not the end photo where they're smiling, but the process photo where their happiness is so contagious. I decided not long ago that I wanted to be that person; the person so happy in the moment that even with a less-than-perfect outcome, they'd still be thrilled because they got to Do The Thing. And it's not too surprising that when I started putting more emphasis on the process and being happy through all the tiny steps how much improved my overall mindset became. Liz Stouthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18267806576736655184noreply@blogger.com